Cromagnon

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Cromagnon (Cr) is a substance mostly found in the lower layers of the Earth crust as a vicious and viscous fluid.

Once upon a time, possibly at some point between the Tonight Show and the Today Show, cromagnon was actually inferior humans walking on Earth with minority complexes as they continually compared e.g. their sexual organs to those of dinosaurs. Yes, dinosaurs have many of them, that's why they thought they were inferior, having only one sexual organ each. This awkward limitation was later inherited by humans, and the workaround by nature was to split the species into two genders.

The story behind the cromagnon men turning into a vicious and viscous fluid is a disturbing one. This transition from organism to fluid occurred approximately 1 million years BC as cromagnon fell into a giant pit of acid, set up as a trap by a still unknown being, fellowship, or organization. Their aggressive behavior was however preserved as a paraphysical property of the fluid, making it vicious, and the resulting fluid from the reaction that occurred made the acidic fluid slightly more viscous than normal.

Effects on the Human Body[edit]

Recent pollution of the lower atmosphere by high concentrations of lawyers, politicians, and reality shows have caused large quantities of Cromagnon to be pulled from the Earth's crust by caterpilliarary action. Cromagnon is a toxic agent, and should not be ingested by humans. Its known effects on the human body include lowering of the victim's IQ, a tedency in the victim to presume he or she is right even in the face of overwhelming evidence to the contrary, and over-use of buzzwords. It is due to these effects that many corporations have begun piping vaporized Cromagnon into the offices of potential middle-management employees.

See also[edit]