Daily Sport

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Because of their incurable biases, the so-called experts at Wikipedia will probably never have an article about Daily Sport. We are sorry they insist on being this lame.

The Daily Sport is known throughout Britain as a repository of unimpeachable truth. It is the only newspaper opinion-formers turn to when unbiased clarity of thought and hard fact is required on any subject.


The founder of the paper, Sir Richard Littlejohn (b 1937 - d 2017), used the money he won from a pro-celebrity Death Tic-Tac-Toe tournament to start publishing a paper that would, he said: "Make your hair stand on end."

The paper was an immediate success.

The first issue ran the front page headline: Britney's Threepenny Bits Inside!!!, causing many curious coin-collectors to buy the paper to study pictures of the fine examples this well-known young lady proudly displayed.

The paper also became known for it's probing, serious articles covering the moral values of politicians, such as: Condoleeza Rice: Phwoar! Wot a Scortcher!, and: We Rate Maggie Thatcher 10 out of 10 on Hot-or-Not!!

Other long-running columns, such as Upskirt School-girl Voyeur Photos!! covering fashion and female apparel, and the highly popular Crikey!! Jumbo Juggs and Jubblies Extravaganza!! concerning anatomy and human development, have ensured that the paper remains ahead of the competition in the quality news market.

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