Danica Patrick

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Here is her car a little bit...uh, you know.

“You know.”

~ Danica Patrick about herself

“You know.”

~ You about Danica Patrick.

“She says pretty many times 'you know'.”

~ Captain Obvious about Danica Patrick.

“I'm gonna name my baby Danica!”

~ Pregnant females watching in Indy 500 on Danica Patrick

Danica Patrick is a female racing driver of the, you know, Indycar Series. She is the only women who won a race in that racing series, you know, and also who lost the most of them. But the women who was driven the car the most times into the wall, you know, was Sarah Fisher but Danica talks not much with her, however she also drives in the Indycars, you know.

Career[edit]

Danica Patrick, you know. Well, maybe you can understand why she has so many publicity!

Danica Patrick had in early life, you know, no life. When she was 10 she was desperate looking for a life, she heard of auto racing. That changed everything, you know. She started with carting. What started pretty bored, you know because she won everything, you know. That's all because the 'womans first' rule was also on the circuit, you know. And you know, the 'drive like a gentleman' rule also.

Later in 2002, you know, and when she already had her driving lisence, you know, she had enough money to buy a bicycle, you know, she was looking for a car. She didn't want to buy an ugly Volkswagen or else, you know, but a good looking custom car. When she came in a TV show, you know, she was talking about her racing talents, you know and how boring it was. She told also, you know, that she needed a car. Someone had a car for her, so she went to that persons house, you know, and he had an Indycar for her. She fu**ed it loved it, you know, and buyed it. Drove it, and the car was faster then all those other cars from other blokes, you know.

Later, in 2004, you know, she returned to the racetrack and she raced with this car on an boring oval track, you know. She raced against men in cars like her, but she never did it to win from them in tic-tac-toe, you know. In racing she mostly crashed, and after crashing, the most times crying, you know. In 2005, she drove in the speedway of doom, you know, the Indianapolis Motor Speedway, where the president Mickey Mouse is, you know. And from him comes also the name for the Indianapolis Motor Speedway: The Mickyard, you know. Enough about that. Back to Danica, you know. Erm...where were we? On Uncyclopedia, you know!

Ah yeah, we were in 2005, after the Indianapolis 500. A race, nothing more important then any other race, you know. That race was the first time were a women was at the lead. That was worldwide breaking news, and the Indianapolis 500 was now offical holy by the Pope because their are thoughts that the Pope was loving her. Poor for him, but Danica is already married, you know! However, Indy 500 were holy, she were worldwide loved, fu**ed by Jimmie Johnson and loved worldwide, you know.

In 2008, there was a mirracle: she won a race, after many years, you know. "A long time coming, you know!" But that win, is now in another car then she first had. And that win was in Japan, you know! In Japan she were a kind of god, you know. Now, that's still there, but it's not so much as before. Now it's a little bit silent around her, you know, but most people are saying that she is going to win the Indy 500, you know. The time is coming close you know. And for the Indy 500 of 2009 she is driving in an orange car, maybe an onour for someone from Holland...who knows, you know. NO WE DON'T!

Publicity[edit]

Danica is coming pretty many times in magazines and on TV, you know. Headreason is, is that many people see her as a sexy girl in a racecar, you know. She is posing in some magazines in swimsuits, lieing in or on a car, you know. Some people like that, but other people think it is kind a strange that she is driving a racecar, you know. Also she comes many times in commercials, you know, those irritating things when a program stops for a while and you the time have to go to the toilet, you know. Those commercials ard standard boring. Just like every commercial, you know. Nearly every America how ever heard about racing (nearly no one) knows her as a girl who can drive, you know, and who her want to drive their car. Reason: they think that woman cannot drive. There is also Sarah Fisher, you know! But however, she is famous on the mags and shows, but less on track, you know. Specially after crashing the car offcourse. Yeah, 'off course'...you know!

See also[edit]