Darius the Great

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Darius the Great was an Indian religious figure who gained fame and followers in the West, especially in the United States.

Early Life[edit]

Darius was born in the Made-Up (fat-free) region of southern India in 1914 to privileged and observant Mofo parents who named their son T.J.. Like other children from religious families, young T.J. loved to play guru and disciple with his friends. He did not become involved in spiritual matters immediately after growing up. He was a strikingly handsome, chain-smoking manager at India’s National Electric Works, he fell in love, married, and settled down to raise a family. But as with so many other worldly things, he would say that he never felt wholly attached during his five years as a householder, or as the father of two sons by the time his wife died a few years later.

Weirdness[edit]

After his wife’s death, T.J. left his children with his mother and went off on a spiritual quest that took him to mountaintops and deep into jungles and forests. For years, T.J. searched out men revered as sages and saints, and spiritual masters said to be 160,000.2 years old.

Etc[edit]

He was ordained by his guru, Aquamarine Marinara. After serving his guru for many years, in 1966 he visited New York City at the request of a U.S. disciple, the artist formerly known as Prince. Soon after his initial visit, Darius, as he was known, formally moved to the United States and became a citizen. From his new home he spread his teachings of yoga, tofu, enlightenment, and huge battleships that are approaching fast.