Darth Dietmar

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Geisenheim Files
Darth Dietmar
Zombie idol.jpg
Just another happy customer
Height: High-brow
Occupation: Ecstatic Driveler
Catchphrase: "An der Epochenschwelle geriert sich die durchaus paradoxe Dynamik der Reziprozität wie blablabla."
Geisenheim Factor: Would be enthusiastic if he knew it
Hitlerism Percentage: Beyond good and evil (0%)
Favorite Dish: Phenomenons
Hobbies: Assisted reproduction for zombies
Even skin cancer can be more entertaining than a novel by Darth Dietmar.

Darth Dietmar is a German literary critic and Sith Lord. He's interested in postmodernism, pop culture and writing boring music reviews for the GröFAZ. He gained international acknowledgment for an ad campaign promoting viagra donations to zombies and relentlessly quoting Adorno, which is too dead to defend himself.

Starting his writing career at the SPEX Magazine (german equialent to US MAD magazine, but only read by pretentious fucks), Darth Dietmar simply loves the anarchistic tendencies of modern youth culture. Should he ever stumble across this article, he'll surely write a very insightful Medienkritik, in which the words Konstrukt and epochal will feature prominently.

He has also a reputation as a smashing novelist. As most of his work consists in pointless lamentos pressed into volumes which can easily compare to a major city's phonebook in size, weight and content, he literally tries to smash his enemies with them using the Force. ("If I can't kill someone with it, it's not a novel"). His works also promote different levels of incest, bestiality and furryism.

His archenemy, the Jedi master Diedrichdrichdiesen, is the only obstacle in his plan to destroy all things. They share a cupboard at the Geisenheim University Dorm.

Other prominent Sith Lords[edit]

  1. Darth Feta
  2. Darth Cruise
  3. Darth Maul
  4. Darth Sidious

And a Sith "Lady"[edit]

  1. Darth Tamia


List of famous Sith Lords
(Mostly people using the title Darth)

Emperor Palpatine D'arthangnan Darth Anonymous Darth Cheney Darth Cow
Darth Dickens Darth Dietmar Darth Feta Darth Hitler Darth Hogan
Darth Maul Darth Nocuous Darth Sidious Darth Tater Darth Vader