Darth Wilde

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Darth Wilde circa 1986.

Darth Wilde is the proud son of the great Oscar Wilde and runs an automobile-smashing shop in Coruscant. Wilde also helped design the Neon in 1995, after he noticed all the awesome cars in his shop. Wilde was born in 1923, in the middle of Nowhere. In 1964, while attending the greatest Dai To concert ever, the band's bassist, Dylan Argus, suddenly collapsed on stage and died of a triple heart attack. Luckily, while moshing, Wilde flexed his gigantic arms and Dylan Argus was revived. Wilde then proceeded to mosh some more.

Wilde went in for a sex change operation in 1970, but he kept his name and was still considered by many to be a male, due to his huge arms. Wilde now resents the operation and has told people many times to call him a "him", not an "it". Wilde may move in with his father in 2007, but many of his fans and stalkers deny it.

Currently, Darth Wilde appears in an annoying Internet ad for Vonage.