Door knob

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Door Knobs can be harmful. If you ever see one, you should readily rape it before it can rape you!

“Slob on my knob, and do your job.”

~ Three Six Mafia on Door Knobs

“I believe myself to be gay.”

~ Oscar Wilde on himself

The door knob is considered the greatest invention of all time. Renowned genius Zsa Zsa Gabor invented the door knob in order to end world hunger. As a result, door knob is the most popular food in all of Africa.

History of titties[edit]

  • 1208: zoe enns creates the first door knob and has intercourse with it.
  • 1490: Oscar Wilde writes in his autobiography, "I door knob there was such thing as a wish!"
  • 1492: The door knob is invented by Gabor while on the Titanic with Christopher Columbus.
  • 1498: Door knobs are mass produced by Microsoft using the operating system "Doors 98".
  • 1500: Missionary Howard Hughes convinces an entire tribe of Native Americans that door knobs are the "incredible, edible knobs" as well as the "other shiny meat" and "Very good building materials".
  • 1932: The poverty of the Great Depression leads to the first door knob to sex toy conversion.
  • 1990s: August 29th, 1997 Judgement Day when the door knobs achieved sentience and started to terminate everyone.
  • 2000 The millennium bug strikes door knobs all over Iran causing the Iran government to ask for help from neibouring country Disney Empire, who told them to buy 75% of their stocks of cartoon porn, which Iran agreed on (This now makes Iran the leading supplyer of Disney Porn behind Oscar Wilde who owns 55% of the worlds door knob porn).
  • 2003: It is discovered by Lou Ferrigno that door knobs can be used for opening doors.
  • 2004: Door handles were invented which meant that door knobs are no longer needed.
  • 2005: War broke out between door handles and Knobs.
  • 2006: George Bush bombs door knobs all over the world to make room for his ice cream collection, which includes the famous "oil flavoured" ice cream which is estimated to be worth $1.99 per gallon. Thus makes the U.S bankrupt and forcing them to sell Devin Los Lobos.