Electric scissors

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July 8, 2020 at 23:25Not only utilized for their time-saving capabilities, ninjas have created a unique nose hair snip attack that is impossible to counter.


The first pair of electric scissors were created by Marvin Gaye in 1955. The wall plug-in model electric scissors he created wasn't selling as well as expected to its prime market, smurfs. His mother recalled "he would curse anything blue and say 'those MF'ers aint got hands big enough for real scissors, what the F is their problem they need this S.'" Later he would sell the rights to Steve Jobs who later created the biggest electronic craze to sweep Canada, battery operated electric scissors then later iElectric scissors.

This news soon reached a small ninja clan living in Antarctica, known as the snow ninja. They were exceptional ninja since they constantly dealt with black uniforms in a white landscape. They decided in the still of the night that they would steal the plans from Jobs's secret Canadian fortress. It was not a easy task, but once they returned home the ninja constructed the modified Solar/Ultimate powered all black ninja model electric scissors. Soon the clan began to sell construction and training manuals for the Solar/Ultimate powered all black ninja model electric scissors to other clans over the secret ninja internet.

Electric Scissors Come in Four (4) Varieties[edit]

  1. Wall Plug-in model electric scissors
  2. Battery Operated electric scissors
  3. iElectric scissors
  4. Solar/Ultimate powered all black ninja model electric scissors


  • Second generation of electric scissors, Battery Operated Electric Scissors were first developed by Steve Jobs on a LSD trip. They would eventually replace wall plug-in model electric scissors.

Alternate Meanings[edit]

The Electric Scissors was also a dance that was made popular in the 80s, but is still very common at parties. You slide to the left and clap, slide to the right and clap, and scream "ELECTRIC SCISSORS!". Then you take 3 hops and break it down. Then you take your corner and do-si-do 5 times and then promenade. Then you put your hand on the lady's waist and the other on her shoulder and bend really far forward with a rose in your mouth.

See Also[edit]