Enter Shikari

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Enter Shikari
Enter Shikari are known for their unanimous hatred of mirrors.
Origins St. Albans, just like that Stephen Hawking guy (who, just like lead singer Rou, can only make horrible noises that can sometimes be distinguished as words unless he uses a keyboard), England
Years Active Half an hour
Genre Scremectrockore
Labels Ambush Reality, AKA Enter Shikari
  • James Blunt (Leonard) - God, mentor, the sex
  • Ruffton Reynolds (Rou) - vocals, electronics
  • Christophski von Battenstein (Chris) - bass
  • Rory Cowbell (Rory) - guitar
  • Richard Wolf (Rob) - drums
  • Barry Scott - Screamo vocals

Enter Shikari are a British-slash-Indian-hunter band founded by James Blunt and who specialize in the musical genre of ... ah ... what's screamo, emo, electronic, rock and post-hardcore put together? Scremectrockore? That'll do. No one cares anyway. They are most well-known for their boring, uneventful concerts, where they play a few Michael Jackson covers before going off and talking about how their drummer, Robby, was 2nd to Macaulay Culkin for the role of Harry Potter, and how he lost due to being too ghey.

Debut Album[edit]

Enter Shikari's debut album entitled "Take Lots Of Pies" has had some well...Shit reviews. This is due to the fact that most of the album is well...Shit. The tracks are:

  • 1. Stand your ground; Your mothers around.
  • 2. Enter Shinobi
  • 3. MotherShit
  • 4. Anything Can Happen in the next 57 weeks, 2 days, 18 hours, 35 minutes and 46 seconds.
  • 5. That bit that fills our album....
  • 6. Babyrinth
  • 7. Mmm Sssweat
  • 8. Today Will Be In My History Lesson.
  • 10. Forget Duracell, Return To Energiser
  • 12. Sorry you're grans a Milf (My Wife's a Bowl)
  • 13. ALBUM FILLZ!
  • 14. Jonny Snipper
  • 15. A Jew
  • 16. OK, Time for Masturbation

The Zune[edit]

Recently Enter Shikari had bought a Zune. They had been using iPods for years, they were so happy about the purchase of their new Zune that they made another Shit album. The tracks are:

  • 1. The Breasts
  • 2. Kickin' Back on the Surface of Your Ass Cheeks
  • 3. Keep it on Mice
  • 4. A Jew (crazy dance remix)
  • 5. Sorry you're grans a Ginger! (recorded in the bathroom)
  • 6. Mothershit (recorded in the bathroom)
  • 7. Ass's Nation
  • 8. Enter Shinobi (recorded in the bathroom)

Fourtunately, Only 4000 copies of this album were made so only few people had to hear Rou taking a shit while trying to sing at the same time.


An unknown psychological problem from Rou's childhood has given him the false impression that it is always summer, and so must always display his unhumanly hairy legs by wearing shorts.
  • The word "Shikari" is Indian for "An appropriate band name, please".
  • Chris is constantly mocked because his name is the only one that doesn't begin with "R".
  • Shikari is actually the name of a former members mother. He left when the band decided to keep the name.
  • Their first single, Mother's Hip, got the band off to a rocky start because of it's incestuous nature.
  • Tracks 14 and 15 (Jonny Snipper and a jew) on the new album, lead many fans to believe the band are of jewish heritage
  • Don't worry, they're not really good.
  • The word "Enter" is English for "Enter".
  • 'Forget Duracell, Return to Energiser' was inspired by the famous incident where Janet Jackson exposed her breast at the Superbowl.
  • In their leisure time, the band like to stand around like statues.
  • The song "Sorry You're Not A Winner" was written after theyheld autitions for decent band members. None of the good ones were allowed in, instead they took a bunch of gayemos to mix two popular styles of music, and create some ungodly nsongs.
  • So amateurish, unexciting and trendy that many fundamentalist rock fans believe they are harbingers of the rock/metal apocalypse, whereby elvis, dimebag, cliff burton and hendrix will rise from the dead to lead the righteous rock hordes against the minions of false metal.
  • They are quite good, just not in a 'talented way'.
  • Still, they are quite good- **Rou**
  • The drummer was once kicked out of his own show for climbing on a balcony and drawing on his scrotum.
  • It is rumoured that Enter Shikari did not truthfully sell out the 2,000 capacity Astoria in November 2006, instead Rou's dad paid the venue to let people in for free. The audience left shortly afterwards, after Chris was hit in the face with an orange peel.
  • In their "Sorry Your'e Not a Winner" music video, Rou can be seen deepthroating his green microphone, this is a regular activity that Rou participates in.
  • Chris aka sexy bassist has laryngitis now, from much deep throating.
  • Obviously Enter Shikari wouldn't be where they are without their amazing forum members, who seem to turn every topic into a discussion about sex.
  • Enter Shikari openly admit to stealing their style from the lesser known band 'You And What Army?'.
  • Enter Shikari did a song for Xbox 360 game Blue Dragon, by which I mean Rou wanked all over a MicroKorg and gave it to them under the bands name.

See Also[edit]