F-bomb

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Bomb.png Somebody set up us the bomb.
For great justice take off every 'zig'.
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For the religious among us who choose to believe lies, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about F-bomb.
A flame bomb tring to summon Oof


The F-bomb is often confused with someone saying the F-word, but that's not what an F-bomb is. An F-bomb is a bomb that can do anything that starts with the letter "F" and can cause massive damage to anyone or any thing. (And that includes the ever so strong Chuck Norris.) Since the F-bomb can do damage in a way that starts with "F", there are many different F-bombs.

Powerful F-bombs[edit]

Fissure Bomb
Creates large fissures in the ground that can sink large buildings, trap people in side them, and defeat Godzilla (or Gojira for non-nerdish people).
Fracture Bomb
Will fracture anything in its blast radius, including body parts.
Finishing Bomb
Finishes off any unfinished work an earlier F-bomb started. Not to be used as first attack on other countries, it will be totally ineffective.
FAIA Bomb
Constructs very large buildings that produce harmful chemicals that will soon kill everyone in that general area. This bomb is basically an FAIA member on caffeine and steroids.
Fusion Bomb
Fuses anything in its blast radius together. Even people.
Philosophy Bomb
Gives everyone great knowledge to share among one another. Sooner or later, they will argue, fight, then use other powerful F-bombs on each other (takes awhile but everyone will die at some point in life).
Fake Bake Bomb (Super)
Will insta-tan everyone in sight with a blinding light, in fact anyone who looks at the light will be blinded until 2360 A.C.E.. This tan is only temporary because it's a fake tan cause by fake UV waves. The knowledge of the fake tan will cause people to become irritable and want to kill others that have nothing to do with the dropping of the Super Fake Bake Bomb.
Flame Bomb
Makes a very large flame appear. This flame will summon the fire god, Oof, who will kill -17 Civilization.
Foresight Bomb
Causes everyone to foresee that they are about to get bombed again.

FAFSA Bomb: Devastates entire area with massive amounts of merit based loans and a few need based grants (but grants are so rare and will probably never happen to you so its probably not even worth mentioning). The total effect of a FAFSA attack is not fully understood until 4-6 years later when FAFSA infected victims find themselves tens of thousands of US dollars (or 18 and a half Euros).

Why F-bombs are taboo[edit]

George W. Bush approving the use of F-bombs in War

Although it may be fun dropping F-bombs left and right, they have become taboo because of their violent nature. It all happened after Zues blew up Pangaea with an F-bomb. Ever since that day I think happened, all F-bombs have been considered illegal, but still extremely fun. Some people keep F-bombs hidden in barns disguised as WD-40s, which are disguised as cows and horses. There are still F-bombs in the military and meth dealer's basements, but they have yet to catch interest in the public's view. They have also been proven to be able to destroy pinball machines, which are obviously indestructible.