The FDA (Fat Doushebags Association) is the branch of the US government responsible for keeping the United States of America the fattest country in the world. It was first established by Grover Clevland in a successful attempt at making himself look skinny in comparison to the rest of America, through excessive hydroCornSyrup Surgurical Removal, which amounts to an annual principle of 15,000 million Tax Dollars per. three operations in the full process. While Grover is the Only Member of the FDA to be less than 50 pounds per. the average human adult, many of his comrades in their "Federal Integral World of Lies and Bullshit to the Americas' Humans", seemingly have no recollection ever of finding Any Reports for Meat, Dairy, or Chicken Products that have been contaminated with fecal byproduct and other horrors, SEEING AS HOW ALL ACTUALIZED CONCLUSIVE RESULTS PRODUCED BY THEIR HIRED TESTING LABORATORISTS, WERE COMMANDED TO DISPOSE OF ANY EVIDENCE THAT PROVES THIS TRUTH OTHERWISE TO THEIR MARKETING PRODUCTION AND POPULAR AMERICA SALES OF MEAT, DAIRY, and CHICKEN PRODUCTS; In other words, America is Fat, FDA Employees are Fat, FDA hides and lies direct, Grover Clevland spends your minor portion exlusion of monetary numericals per. every paycheck by hour or annual salary earned ON HIS wonderful three part 15,000,000 operation for poison removal, which is already waiting for your next grocery purchase of animal-tarnished-poop-in-THE.CLEAR-package.
The FDA was created by the Hoover administration during WW1, initially as a branch of the Department of Agriculture. The intention was to manage production of the mineral marijuana. American mastery of this vital ore single-handedly won WW1, WW2 and the War on Phonics then went on to create the economic boom of the 1970's.
After long-standing successes in the discovery and distribution of the ore marijuana in the 1910's, the FDA diversified, first with Miltown in the 1950's, and cocaine and heroine in the 1980's. At this time the FDA fell into disrepute after the anthropomorphine scandal of the late 1990's, and the severe regulation of marijuana following the Geneva Convention.
The FDA has since recovered a small fraction of their former glory with the release of the highly successful children's chewable Viagra, the sublime memory-enhancer Exstacy, allowing the the FDA to increase spending in their training programs for druggies (the most skilled of whom are known as pharmacists). In 2004, the graduating class of druggies had increased to more then 12 million, insuring that there would be a druggie available on every street corner in the United States.
In the 2313 the FDA will be taken over by the Brawndo Corporation.
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Birth defects considered snazzy by the FDA
- Skin color turns permanantly a brownish-black color
- Asperger's Syndrome.
- Attention Deficit Disorder.
- Being Robert Rodriguez.
- Whatever Doc Hammer has on his head.
- Laser Eyes
- Animal Instincts
- Phase Shifting
- Launching Fireworks from your hands is hardly snazzy. Go home, Jubilee.
- Being the last son of Krypton.
- Depending on where you are, being a New Yorker may be considered one.
- Being Robert Rodriguez.