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A flange is a metallic flan or quiche which forms the staple food for robots. Although robots do also enjoy snacking on staples, staples are not the staple food. It is possible to use the word in sentances such as, Where art thou flange and me and my mum make flanges to eat.


The first flange was baked in 1736 by Mrs Helen Highwater of Wales. This original flange was cooked to a prehistoric Italian recipe, using a simple combination of copper and iron. Today, the copper and iron flange is called Flange Lorraine or Flance Margharitta, both of which mean "plain and boring, somewhat tasteless, but nevertheless cheap and therefore relatively good value for money flange".

Mrs Highwater fed the original flange to her favourite robotic sheep, LLangochgochllogowbyllofllenogochgochgochllanllanllllllllan. The sheep, together with the remains of the flange, can be seen in the International Museum of Flanges in the United States city of Baghdad.

The development of the flange was slow at first, until the Great Staple Crisis of 1987, which led to the establishment of the LLangochgochllogowbyllofllenogochgochgochllanllanllllllllan Flange Export Company. The flange was simultaneously patented by Microsoft, Apple computer, Wikimedia, Mozilla and Coca Cola in the USA, but in the rest of the world is manufacturered solely by anyone.

Rivalry and Competition[edit]

The popularity of flanges, and indeed the word flange, has taken the world by storm. Flange first entered the top ten list of words ending in a "j" sound in 1956, but climbed into the top ten list of all words ever list in 1963 and has remained there since. There has, however, been competition from other words ending in a "j" sound, such as:

  • Lounge
  • Marriage
  • Cabbage
  • Fudge
  • Uncyclopediage
  • Mange
  • Orange

Flange has also faced stiff competigion from "Marge" and "Garbage" although these words were subsequently ruled illegal by the European Union; "marge" because it's short for margarine and "garbage" because it's rubbish.

Flange varieties today[edit]

Today's most popular flange varieties are:

  • Iron and burning rubber (considered a delcacy in Essex)
  • Steel and peanut
  • Plutonium surprise
  • Bronze and Enriched Uranium
  • Florida Foil Flange