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“Im a Flirt”

~ R. Kelly on flirting

“I was flirting with one dude once, but when I took him home, it turned that he was a fucking she”

~ Oscar Wilde on flirting

“Mastered The Art Of Chasing The Skirt, I Have”

~ Yoda on Flirting

“Was M*A*S*H about flirting?”

~ Confused Guy on Flirting

“There was this one time, when I thought my waitress at Denny's was flirting with me, but she wasn't. So I killed her and dumped her body off I-95 to hide the akwardness”

~ Mao Tse Tung on Flirting

Flirting is the natural human and dolphin means of obtaining a sexual partner. There are many differences between male and female methods of flirting. Flirting methods differ between ages and IQ levels. For example a man with an IQ of 50 is more likely to get a mating partner than a man with 120. As we all know the formula (Women= Muscle Level- IQ)

Flirting In Males[edit]

Men like to think they are geniuses in the art of flirting. The sad news is, most are not. There are various levels of the Male Mastery Of Flirting

These Include:

Sith Lord Cruise

Once the level of master is achieved, it is entirely possible to attract a woman using a simple wink, or, as preferred by Yoda, nod of the head. A novice flirter may try to use strange voices or interesting ties to attract a woman, neither of those work, that was Franks problem. A padawan can be trained by a knight or master (but not a Jedi, as humor, wit and snappy dressing cannot be taught) to reach a higher mastery of the flirt. This training can sometimes take a decade to complete, but all men come out better people. Except that is, the Sith Lords, instead of putting in the hard work to attract women, they use their perfect bone structures. Sith lords and Jedi often do battle, sadly the Jedi often lose, as Muscles beat Wit, 98% of the time. The current Sith Lord, Tom Cruise did battle with Jedi James Blunt, sadly James lost, and wrote the song "Tears And Rain" about the incident.

"Im looking for that pretty women!" How to come on too strong.

Flirting In Women[edit]

Its a little known fact that women have a hidden gene, called EVIL (Extra Virol Incident Language). They use this evil gene to trick many men into perfoming various medial tasks such as: giving them money, distracting them so they can steal money, and sex. Unlike men, they do not need to learn the skill of flirting, they are born with it.

Disasters That Originated With Flirting[edit]

Disasters That Forewent Flirting and Went Straight to the Good Stuff[edit]

Related Links[edit]