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For those without comedic tastes, the self-proclaimed experts at Wikipedia have an article about Freegan.

This is a page about some hippy subculture. It is not to be confused with the word "Friggin'", which, after all these years, remains fun to say. Friggin' friggin' friggin'.

Welcome, agent 9.

Take a seat. Have some saltines — they come from the Agency's own granary. Cigar? I understand.

The following presentation will summarize all intelligence we've collected thus far on the rising "freegan" movement. We still are not entirely certain what they want from us. Perhaps we'll never know. In any case, their presence is one to be reckoned with, and I believe you'll agree that the time to act is now.

What are freegans?[edit]

Freegans are a stealth class of parasites, living off filth and garbage in the shadows of civilization. They do this not out of necessity but as a form of protest against the system. The system has yet to respond, and the proverbial ball remains in its court.

In addition to subsisting on dumpsters, freegans advocate unemployment, based on the belief that acquiring money leads only to unhappiness, and the waste which they themselves do their best to eliminate. This fact has lead to the common term "lazy asses." Personally, I would agree, but this isn't the time or place for subjective opinions.


We have recently become aware of the emergence of a freegan sub-sub-culture known as "consumigans." Consumigans elect to take part in society by getting jobs, earning money, acquiring "stuff", and deliberately wasting food and other valuables. They do this to support their freegan brethren who would otherwise be living at a level almost fatally below the poverty line. The Agency has no current opinion on consumigan activities, but this could change.

Donating to the freegan cause[edit]

To help freegans in their quest for self-sufficiency, click here.

Famous freegans[edit]

Mick Soft [1]

In conclusion[edit]

The moment you leave this room, you will be a freegan named "Sasha Green." I trust that you can make the right descisions.

Good night.

See also[edit]