Fucked up

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Your friend

Fucked up is a way to describe someone apalling, drunk, high, injured, retarded, emotionally disturbed, or any combination of the above. Sometimes things get so fucked up, you start to lose your shit. This is usually when your shit gets fucked up, as a result of your losing it. At this point, it is recommended that you seek medical attention, preferably through a doctor specialising in this area.

How To Get Fucked Up[edit]

Task accomplished

There are many ways of getting fucked up, each with their own benefits and hazards. Most involve hurting yourself. Some involve substances, while others involve physical injury, and one usually precludes the other. Still, sometimes getting fucked up takes years to perfect. Talk to your parents about this. THEY KNOW AAAAAALL ABOUT IT.

  • Jump off a really tall building.
  • Jump off a really small building.
  • Go to a bar and find the biggest ugly dude you can and say this to him, 'your face should carry a "Warning! the following visuals may upset sensitive viewers" warning'.
  • Then kiss him, hold him tight and say to him that you'll never let him go.
  • To get really really fucked up, purchase a bottle of Tequila or other such strong liquor, and knock it back quickfast.
  • To get even more really fucked up, purchase a bottle of Drano and eat it.
  • If you have any chemical drugs at your disposal, now would be the time to inhale, huff, snort, inject, or otherwise injest them.
  • Stumble to the toolshed. Grab a hammer. Hit yourself in the face.
  • If the hammer doesn't work, use a cutting tool.
  • If the cutting tool doesn't work, use the door.
  • The blowtorch works well, but probably hurts more than it actually fucks up. Use it anyway.
  • If you're not fucked up by now (even though you probably are), run into the streets pushing and shoving people, and if you can, try to get hit by a car or two. If you can manage to get to the top of any tall free-standing structure, falling off of it will also probably fuck you up.
  • Congratulations! You are Fucked Up! The fact that you even followed these directions at all is clinching proof that your up is totally fucked!

Things That Are Fucked Up[edit]

Your nose


It's been known for a while that some people are just fucked up. Mostly those who follow strange cults such as "Christianity", "Edward Cullen" and "Republicans". You're probably fucked up right now, for all I know. People get fucked up by drinking alcohol, doing drugs, and jumping in front of cars or off of buildings. Some people get so fucked up that they actually die. As in, "He got fucked up and died."

That's pretty fucked up


Used to describe a particular place that is/has been fucked up. As in, This place is fucked up.

Television Programs[edit]

Some people have a sick minded sense of humor, and choose to exhibit it upon the masses in the form of television programs. The television program in question can thus be accurately described as being "fucked up." (As in, "Dude, this show is fucked up.") I've been told by certain sources that Aqua Teen Hunger Force is fucked up. I call those certain sources n00bs. Programs that are fucked up are often funnier than programs that are simply fucked.


Occasionally, shit has been known to get fucked up. (Shit referring to any of the abovesaid articles, for emphasis on its amount of up that has been fucked.) If someone wants to fuck up your shit, they want to hurt you, or cause you to be hurt by having your shit fucked up. It is advised that you fuck up their shit before they can fuck up your shit, because having your shit fucked up fucking sucks.

See also[edit]