Gangsta

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A Gangsta refers to a black man, with no rights, no morals, no money (aka half of America's slums. The gangsta's performance in front of his low life friends dubbed as "His Crew", give the gangsta the sense of respect he so greatly never earned. If you want to join the crew, you have to be part of the crew. A gangsta always backs up his homies at all times, until the very end. Much like marriage, only you actually care this time, ya dig.

A common hobo in Jo mama street, the gangsta capital.
An example of a gangster that is high on weed.

Gangsters are vicious Assassins that like to pop people up with a Glock 40. Gangsta is someone who is certified by the Nationally Elected Gangsta Regulatory Organization who is qualified to operate heavy machinery while under the influence of sleep-inducing cough medicines in addition to perpetrating a hammer, a chainsaw, and a perfectly ripe grapefruit wit they fizzle at tha same tizzy, na'a mean? Gangsters from all over the world have been rallying up in Chicago planning on making their own country. They say, "We tired of da popo tryin ta bring us down!" This may be the reason for the skyrocket in crime in Chicago. Gangsters are all over the world!

The head gangster of the world is the President of the USA.

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“SHIZZLE MA NIZLLE YA FRIZZLE.. LET DO THA DRIZLLE WITHZ THA SHIZNIT”

~ Snoop D-O-duble Gizzle on Da Gangsta Life


Characteristics[edit]

Gangstas are known and loved throughout the hood. Maybe its because of the bagginess of their eggroll pants. Who knows? But what we do know, are some of their traits:

  • They are nice, pleasant, helpful neighbors,often help old lady cross the street
  • They like rap music
  • They smell like weed
  • They always wear tanktops, even in the snow, yo
  • Gangstas don't listen to no one, not even their mama
  • They have grillz instead of braces, because they look cool
  • They sag their pants for easy access to buttsecks
  • Gangstas never go to a hospital
  • They hang out in allies and under the freeway
  • They smell...really bad
  • The lowlifes of modern society
  • As thick as pig shit
  • Fuck one another over
  • They are faggots
  • They are niggers, or Niggas. They can't shoot for shit.
  • They typically wear chains around their neck that may appear gold, but most definately FAKE GOLD
  • They use pistols, usually desert eagle, but never actually shoot, instead they perfer the peace gesture
  • They carry around condoms in their wallet for better chances of sex

How Do I Become a Gangsta?[edit]

In order to be a gangsta, you have to join a local gang near your location. Make sure you recruit the biggest fags from your school and buy bandannas at the local dollar store to seem even cooler. This part is easy, all you have to do is look for a group of losers doing suspicious activity in their front lawns or if you see a bunch of mean looking dudes in tanktops on bikes. This is the fun part, they'll give you a bunch of "fun" challenges that you will have to complete alive, which include, but are not limited to: Surviving a gang beating, see how long you can leave your hand in an oven, the tightening of the penis with a tight rubberband for 30 minutes, 50+ punches to the groin, smuggling pirate DVDs, etc. Once you swear by the gangsta oath, your in homes. If said gangsters are gay, cock sucking can be used as initiation as well, which is perferred by many gangsters. But why would you want to become a Gangsta in the first place?

Disadvantages of Being a Gangsta[edit]

Although being a gangsta is fun and carefree, there are also risks to being one aswell. These risks include: The poo-poo being up in your ass 24/7, the decrease in lifespan by 40 years, rival gangs, drive-bys, shootings, unsanitary bathrooms, you only have one outfit, chances of getting shot increases 10x, snitches, jail, converting into a homosexual and searching for prey who dropped the soap, etc. Once your in, you never go out. Did I mention that its a priority to only listen to rap music.

  • Loss of vision
  • Lack of penis
  • Death
  • Wheelchair
  • Fractored limbs
  • Shank wounds
  • Urine stained clothing
  • Bullet wounds
  • Missing teeth
  • Missing wallet
  • AIDS
  • Jail
  • Getting your ass stomped like the lil punk you are
  • Getting braces ripped off

Can Women be Gangstas?[edit]

Absolutely NOT. Its against the gangsta code to let any form of female become a gangsta. They CAN however, be in the crew as long as they are Hoes. No crew wants to be an all sausage fest (or maybe they do), so of course they are going to have a piece of ass sometime or another. Hoes are also hoodrats, but they will never get anything in return because they are a bunch of whores. Contrary to popular belief, Chollas are NOT gangstas, they are hoodrats, end of story.

(Unless she's willing to give her tits)

Language[edit]

The gangstas have invented their own complex form of the English language. Not even the gangstas themselves can perfect it. According to the international league of languages, it is possible to comprehend the phrases which are drawn out by the mouths of gangsta. Rosetta Stone translated the gangsta language (which was later changed to "G-Talk" by gangsta demand) to English, here are some common phrases heard throughtout the streets. You could learn a thing or two:

Phrase 1:

G-Talk: Yo, man, what's crackalaking mah nigga? Givme some love, man.

White English: Hello.

Phrase 2:

G-Talk: Backstroke lover always hidin' 'neath the covers till I talked to your daddy, he say. He said "you ain't seen nothin' till you're down on a muffin then you're sure to be a-changin' your ways". I met a cheerleader, was a real young bleeder oh, the times I could reminisce. 'Cause the best things of lovin' with her sister and her cousin only started with a little kiss like this!

White English: I had sex the other day.

Phrase 3:

G-Talk: Yo.

White English: Hey, you fat piece of shit, get your mother fucking ass over here, help me out with something.

Phrase 4:

G-Talk: Hey cracker.

White English: I am prejudice against white people. Come near me and I WILL FUCKING STAB/SHOOT U!!

Social Structure[edit]

The gangstas and their crew have ann interesting form of a rank system, much similar to those of the species of dairy. On the top of the gangsta class is the Pack leader, who inherits the thrown after the death of the previous pack leader or because they just don't give a shit anymore. The second highest are the thugs, who are in charge of defending, and protecting the crew. The third highest in the gangsta class is the pimp, and we all know what they do. Below the pimps are the drug dealers who import their narcotics from Mexico and stuff. Below them are the Messenger thugs, who go from street to street to get info on those who have connections with rival gangs and granola. Below the messenger thugs are the hoodrats and hoes, and the lowest class in the crew are the snitches, lol.

What to do when You Encounter a Gangsta[edit]

RUN LIKE HELL, MAN!!!! Thats right man, four fucking exclamation points, this shit is fucking serious. Don't look back, never make eye contact. If they are in vehicles such as bikes, motorcycles, or cars, do a barrel roll. Run to the nearest police station and stay there, but don't snitch though. Gangstas hate the popo, but they hate snitches even moar. If you can't make it don't jump into a body of water (i.e. a pool). Eat a granola bar. They will be waiting in the surface, they are like a swarm of bees. If you are surrounded, stay very still. Gangstas will attack if they sense movement, wait abut 15 seconds, and they will leave. What could happen if you fail to avoid them will result in:

The Tweety bird clock in the background really emphasizes the thoughness.
  • Loss of vision
  • Lack of penis
  • Fractored limbs
  • Shank wounds
  • Urine stained clothing
  • Bullet wounds
  • Missing teeth
  • Missing wallet
  • AIDS
  • Granola Bar

How to Spot a Fake[edit]

Main article: Wigga

Most of it is boring (FAKE)...AND it's been done before...the whole "The people at my suburban high school who wear $300 chains from allowance money+rappers with $300,000 chains blabbing about fancy rims+gangstas in one-room apartments are like, totally the same thing"...that might have been actually funny 15 years ago...but it gets old. They know how to read a book.

How to be Gangsta[edit]

Nigahiga will teach "You" how to be G.

Great Britain (UK)[edit]

About 80% of great brittain is infested with gangsters. but what do you expect? Britain is the homeland of gangsters. Britain is probably the most crime infested area i've ever been to. It's a scary place man...

Gangsters originated in Britain (The most gangsta place of course). In Great Britain, everyone used to be poor, stealing everything, robbing each other, raping people, etc. but modern day Great Britain, everyone are eliteists and think they are better than everyone. Over centuries, gangsters have been victims of hate. all them gaurds, police, and soldiers always tried to stop them from expressing them selves.

One famous gangster from the 1400s invented the grafitti. his name was G HOMO Bona fide Gats Fo ReaL PIMP FrIzZlE. G HOMO Bona fide Gats Fo ReaL PIMP FrIzZlE spraypainted all over Mao's face on the picture in Tiananmen square China but was executed.Freeki' History SON!

One famous gangster also goes by thye name of nura, a special vindictus player. He has been known to run wildy across parts of America, with a 9mm and a baseball bat. His high pitch voice has created a theory that beacause he screams 'ho' so much it is diminishing the possibility of his voice retaining back to that of 1% of a normal males voice. Famous quotes: "Yayaaee!" "Pussioooo" "Wheres mah dragon!?"

His 'dragon' is caused controversial acts of dragon V dragon disputes. His dragon was once a childrens show presenter, but later came out as a gangster and recently married nura. His dragon hides under his bed.

downtown london in 1965

Japan[edit]

About 10& of the population are gangsters but only 5% are genuine. Most of them are victims of the side-effects of G-g-g-g-ggggg-Mixxx. Many have no contact with any gang and most of them don't smoke weed.

Japanese Gangsta Language

(Japanese G-dude): Sup Gook (or Nip, Jap your choice) (Black G-dude translation):Sup nigga

And everything else is black English.

Jo Mama Street[edit]

Jo Mama Street is the name of the country that all the gangsters made. It was awarded "Best town in da werld son!" by Jo Mama Street residents themselves! It's packed with muggers, rapists, butt squeezers, pick pockets, and all that good stuff.

Jo Mama Street picture. as you can see, they are not the best at spelling and at this point, have created a whole new dialect of English.


Jo Mama Street used to be what we always called Florida, but now the gangsters have over-run and infested it with themselves. They are yet to make a flag. there is no official government in this country, but their leader can do anything he wants. his name is G frizzle Pimp fo shizzle Wada Freek? Gangstalicious Pop a Cap SON! Oh No U DI'nt! Gat pot Crackhead G Bonafide Puff Smokey SMOK.

= G frizzle Pimp fo shizzle Wada Freek? Gangstalicious Pop a Cap SON! Oh No U DI'nt! Gat pot Crackhead G Bonafide Puff Smokey SMOK (king) ==

G frizzle Pimp fo shizzle Wada Freek? Gangstalicious Pop a Cap SON! Oh No U DI'nt! Gat pot Crackhead G Bonafide Puff Smokey SMOK's first thing he did was kick out all da old people. he said "Wy day alwayz be cumin to the Gangsta land son?". But the old people never stopped coming so he had a wall built all around the state. Then he made renamed Miami "JO DADDY SON!!" and made it the capital. no one is quite sure what the U.S. government is doing right now but the media says they have been partying ever since Bush left office.

Areas[edit]

Map.jpg

This whole map is where gansters are most populous, ignore the target, it's a spot for a squeduled nukeing or something, no biggie. The cities posted on the map are the main towns duh!


REMINDER: In case you have not figured out yet that gangsters are dangerous, let me tell you, gangsters are dangerous creatures that should be avoided at all costs. Got it? Get it? GOOD!


Gangsta Literature[edit]

"He had a dream-a touching novel" by D-pop Swifty "Official Dictionary of Gangsta English" by Dr.D.R.E "How To Grow Weed In Your Own Garden" by Wizdom K

All from Penguino Libros.

See Also[edit]


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