Garnet Til Alexandros XVII

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Spoiler warning: Plot spoilers, such as the fact that

GARNET'S REAL NAME IS SARAH, QUEEN BRAHNE DIES,AND KUJA IS A MAN.

may follow. Read on at your own discretion.

Garnet "Daguerro" Until Alexandros ExViAyeAye (sometimes known as Garnet "Dagger" Til Alexandros XVII/ the 17th due to crappy translations) is the lead female role of Opening Fantasy IX, a racing game for the PS9. She is the 17th daughter of Queen Brain of Alexandrio. Garnet is is 16 years old, has black and gray hair, and wears an orange jumpsuit.

Her popularity among fans of the Opening Fantasy Series is rivaled only by Link from CD-i and Barney the Dinosaur.

Her majesty Princess Garnet Until Alexandros at last year's Halloween party, dressed in a traditional Opening Fantasy "White Bitch" costume, before committing pseudo-suicide by jumping.


“Ooh.., soft..”

~ Zidane Tribal on Garnet's Ass

Early Years[edit]

“Garnet's lost two Mothers.”

~ Zidane Tribal on Garnet's Childhood

Garnet was born[citation needed] in the desert regions of the Remembered Continent on the planet Gaia. When she was only six, she and her mother hopped the border to the Kingdom of Alexandria. Her hometown had been attacked by a terrorist called Garlic Man hired by the U.S government to wipe out her tribe after they had obtained nuclear weapons. This traumatic experience would affect "The Dagger" for the rest of her life, perhaps being the main cause of her masterminding the Aeris' death scandal.

In an attempt to escape the wrath of the "big eye in the sky" by boat, her mother was killed. Miss Garnet, however, would block out all recollection of her previous life when she was adopted by Queen Brain, until her memory was later triggered by one of her hit singles, "Melodies of Death".

A Royal Pain in the Ass[edit]

After her father's death, Garnet ran away from the castle to flirt with a monkey named Zidane and join his band of prostitutes called Totalitarianism During her flight from Alexandrio, Garnet crashed Totalitarianism's airship into Evil forest after severely damaging Alexandrio castle with a bomb. When the crew was attacked by Black Walnut No. 3, a merciless magician with a "pewnty-hat" sent to retrieve Garnet, she was put in charge of steering the airship. She badly damaged the South Gate during border hopping, and nearly destroyed the ship's engine. These frequent "accidents" caused Garnet to earn the nickname Dagger and eventually got her kicked out of Totalitarianism for good.

An Androgynous man[citation needed][edit]

Knowing that her mother would no longer accept her, Dagger continued her life of prostitution to earn enough money to buy cigarettes. She eventually met Kuja, a fellow prostitute. Dagger and Kuja quickly became bffs and eventually fuck buddies. After Kuja went into Trance however, he revealed that he worked for Garlic man and was Zidanes brother. Shocked that Kuja was actually a man, and that he was Queen Brain's weapon supplier, Garnet ran away from Kuja with Albatross Steiner, a fat knight from Alexandrio castle who had earned himself the nickname ass, for being one of the most stuck up asses she had ever seen.

Steiner, however, later revealed that he had slept with Kuja as no one could resist someone so smexy. Distessed, Dagger gave her hair a whackjob as a cry for attention, and ran off with Zidane.