Golden Balls

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Golden Balls is a game programme hosted by Dr.WhatshisnameIcan'trecall. It is highly popular and the catchphrase, 'Hello, I'm Dr.WhatshisnameIcan'trecall and this is Golden Balls!' is known worldwide and spoken in many tongues including mute. The game was rated the 3/4 second but not yet third (that would have to be 4/4 second) worst game show in the 'What is the worst game show show' in 2008.

The game has but one rule: only men can enter. Entrants must first paint their balls gold, writing either the words 'split' or 'steal' on each. At the end of the game, entrants will choose either split or steal and grab the ball associated with that descision. The biggest prize ever won on the show is $20'000 and a date with Chris Torrent.

After choosing split or steal, the entrant will then show their selected ball to the crowd. At this point, sick bags are handed out due to the fact that some people make quite a mess during this part of the game. If one person chooses split and the other person steal, then the person who chose split takes the prize and the person who chose steal gets slapped. If both choose split, no-one takes the prize, but if they both choose steal then the prize is shared equally between contestants.


Golden balls has a long and extended history starting from yesterday morning when I woke up and decided to write this article. This history is:

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How The Game Works[edit]

Before all the split or steal business entrants must first play the Golden Balls game. This involves a certain number of Golden balls to be given to four players, four each initially, and for three Killer balls (These are the ones that give you an extra life) to be shared randomly between the four. Players show each other ALL their balls before arguing over whose balls are the most gold and who has to lose the first round. At the end of the first round, of course, the entrant who loses must leave the game. Five balls and four killers are then shared out between three players and so on and so forth until there are only two players left. Then the split or steal stage is initiated after five balls are chosen from this long silver rack that actually looks purple. The aim is for balls which have money written on them have to be binned and for the Killer balls to be saved. Fortunately players end up with six Killers to allow them one mistake.

How The Game Doesn't Work[edit]

Players open their phones and start texting. Then the split or steal stage is initiated on this silver rack that actually looks green.

How This Game Applies To Hitler[edit]

Well in a special edition of the show: The contestants were: Adolf Hitler and Rozetta JohnCrosslin who competed for a Grenade over Germany.