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Not just mics, she also enjoys eating ribbons and her clothes to stay in shape.
Parawhore - From left to right: Gay1, Lesbo 1, Gay2 and Gay3
Some days, Hayley doesn't want to have a band orgy. And other days....
Hayley also wants to be tickled by her own band.

Paramore is Emo.
Respect him/her, or one of them will call Addy.

For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Paramore.
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Paramore (a.k.a Parawhore) originated from Franklin, Tennessee where lesbian lead singer met gay/emo guitarist Josh Farro at the Hill Billy ranch. Both collaborated with numerous gay/emo bands, getting laid and even attending spiritual classes for Hayley's conversion to emo, prior to her huge, untold obsession for N'sync. Little is known about the group's formation except that it has something to do with the day lead singer Hayley Williams dyed her hair and had an intense hatred of country music and her former love: N'Sync. Hayley and the three guys in the band whose names are irrelevant used their "music" as an excuse to get the fuck out of the South as soon as possible and took up residence in Will Smith's secret basement lab as seen in I Am Legend, which consists of demented people (not zombies) roaming New York trying to devour every non-demented person left on earth. Yawn. The band originaly agreed to call their band Paraless, because they were emo, but were persuaded by Charmin's that less is more. So they changed their name to Paramore. Hayley Williams is one of the most sexually appealling women in the entire world. If Elton John saw her naked then even he would be strait, for a while.

All We Know is Failing[edit]

While squatting at Smith's, the band surreptitiously used his personal booth that you can "see from the kitchen" to record their first album. Though young, the band did not lack ambition. They quickly decided the recording would be a concept album, writing it around their belief that each of them has failed at everything they've ever done in life. What resulted was 10 tracks (11 for those "lucky" fans in Japan) that justified that belief. The band succesfully fooled listeners with a "cover" of an eleven year old song that was thought to be an original [1].

Hayley Williams's actual birth name is Lucinda Gertrude Smith. Her manager, Fat Dean decided to change it to something a bit more catchy when she got into recording though. From there, a star was born.

Fire Hair Syndrome[edit]

LOL, jesse is gay. ;d

A picture of Hayley Williams scared stiff.

Hayley Williams is the hottest and sexiest rockstar on the planet and I want to pound her pussy.

The setting for the 1413 Universal Golfing Championships, in which Hayley came close to getting holed.


Dude (: Bored muchh?!?! :D

The suits at Paramore's label decided they were ready for the big time and presented them with an entire pre-written album to release. The band refused, citing some sort of "artistic integrity." Suppressing laughter, the executives obliged the teenagers, but reminded them the album would have to "move units" or their two year old dream of rock stardom would end. Tragically, the band misheard the statement as "remove tunics" and returned with 69 tracks about underage premarital sex. The suits were appalled (not at the subject manner, but that the band would return with something so unmarketable) and delivered an ultimatum to be enforced by Puff Daddy: release the pre-written album "Quiet!" bitches. What followed next was a commercial smash led by the hit single "Maternity Business" in which Williams croons, "I'm in the business of maternity./I like it on the top./I've got a body like an hourglass that's sure to rouse your cock./It's just a matter of time before our fame runs out./Come meet me back stage, I'll let you put it in my mouth."


Shortly after their release of the song Decode, that was recorded for the Vampire movie; Twilight. Expanded the Fake Paramore fans, otherwise know as CUTFS (Cashed Up Twilight Fans). Fake Paramore fans are fans of Paramore that are only fans after Paramore recorded their songs for Twilight. And then think that they are real fans when they only know one song (Decode). YOU CAN NOT BE A FAN OF A BAND AND ONLY KNOW ONE DAMN SONG!

Example : Them: "OMG I love Paramore" - Me: "Really, whats your favourite song?" - Them: "Decode" - Me: "Really? have you heard any of their other songs?" - Them: "Nope, but Paramore's my favourite band" - Me: "Yeah, dont talk to me, you suck, fake piece of shit fan!"


A fan of the band and owner of and began to develop a nickname for Paramore-obsessed fans everywhere. The most pervasive became "parawhore" a combination of the band's name and the sexual slur "whore", insinuating that these fans were "whores" for Paramore's music. However, the term was quickly turned back on the fan base <evil laugh>. Some people began to use it to describe male fans at shows who Williams somehow managed to turn into shrieking teenage girls like gay men. Yet another theory is that Hayley is in fact "THE" Parawhore. Uncyclopedia authors have yet to confirm this because we are all computer nerds who have had no contact with women and are thus unable to identify what a whore actually is... but in a fair educated guess she is drag queen with a vagina.

Voice Ability[edit]

Lead singer, Hayley Williams, has been known for her ability and also her habit to "scream". It has said that she's already reached a billion decibels with her voice alone. Controversy sparked during the 2008 Warped Tour, where Hayley deliberately blew her fans' ear drums and hundreds were rushed to the hospital. Miraculously, only 50 were killed. Paramore was eventually kicked out of the Warped Tour.


Studio Albums[edit]

  • All We Know is Failing - 2005 -
  • Quiet! - 2007 -
  • Same Old Songs - 2009


Year Single Peak Chart Positions[1] Album
2005 "Sexual Pressure" All We Know Is Failing
"Emergency (Burn Baby Burn)"
2006 "All We Know is Failing"
2007 "Maternity Business" 115 91 90 103 109 91 90 92 120 99 Quiet!
"Hallelujah (Nature Calls)" 139
2008 "That's What She Said"
"I Cut Myself" Dracula in Love: Original Motion Picture Soundtrack
"—" denotes song was too lame to be charted