Hindi and its Influence

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On Science[edit]

Hindi is the most scientific language after Sanskrit. Due to its scientific nature Indians don't need to do anything in the field of Science. While western scientists have to waste time in observation and experimentation. Indian scientists, thanks to great and powerful language such as Hindi, have to just learn Hindi and all knowledge dawns upon them just like sunlight in the hazy cold winter morning. (However the really great scientists have to learn Sanskrit as well.)

Einstein and Hindi[edit]

“Hindi, the only language from which I ever learned anything.”

This quote sums up all that follows, so you may freely skip this section.

But, now that you have decided to read on, please do continue.

So much has been written on the life of Albert Einstein that it is said that the only other being who has more books written about him is God. The whole life of Einstein is well documented and preserved in various journals, magazines, biographical books, novels, Graffiti, CDs, pubic hair taken from the insides of his nasal cavity, fermented samples of mucus stored in inverted U-shaped tubes, samples of his sweat, urine, and feces carefully preserved and labeled in laboratories around the world and fragments of his brain and skull collected after an explosion to verify the hardness of his head. But one important link, one important clue is missing. All these beautifully concocted stories, all these piles of unsubstantiated facts and fiction, all these rumors and ramblings of disgruntled minds, fail to explain one little aberration, one too conspicuous an oddity, one too fragile a chink in the armor of untruth. The very fact that, how an unkempt, uncouth, obtuse little kid, who could not speak until he was four and who could not read until he was seven, and who somehow dragged his way through schooling, suddenly rose to the pinnacle of science.

The whole world knows the biography of Einstein by now. Without going into details, which are better suited to a detailed article on Einstein, it would be suffice to say that he joined ETH in 1896. But what the world does not know is that, simultaneously, Einstein's father, Hermen Einstein, seeing the utter hopelessness of the situation, decided that Einstein should be enrolled to German institute of Hindi Studies (German: Deutsch-Institut für Studien Hindi, DISH). The following excerpt from a letter written by Einstein's father to Einstein, dated 12th February 1896, is an ample proof of Hermen's desire to see his son study Hindi in DISH.

“über vergessen Durchschnittliche Theorie der absoluteness. Ich wünsche mir, dass Sie sich auf DISH.”

which translates to

“forget about average theory of absoluteness. I wish you to enroll to DISH”

As a result Einstein slyly enrolled into DISH. Hindi being a scientific language, is very easy to learn. Even for a dim witted adolescent that Einstein was, learning was quick and easy. Hindi is a language made for the scientists (aka Brahmins), by the scientists, of the scientists. The gains were almost immediate. As early as 1898, Einstein came up with the formula,

Hindi: ई = ऍम सी स्क्वायर

However, this formula could not be published until 1915, as both German and English were insufficient to express such involved scientific concepts, which though revolutionary to non-Sanskrit speaking people were scrambled here and there in the Vedas and were known even to a two year old Brahmin child since times immemorial. It took Einstein seventeen painstaking years to translate General theory of relativity from Hindi. Much of this theory still remains lost in translation. Finally, Einstein came up with this equation

E = mc2

which is nothing but an excerpt from Rigveda

“10.191.4d yáthā vaḥ súsahā́sati