From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Jump to: navigation, search
Hymen discovery technique.

The hymen is a legend or mythical creature, like the Holy Grail, designed to give all men hope and something to search for, but eventually most die in the process of finding one. The intended purpose of the hymen, if ever discovered, is to pop it. The reason for this is totally unclear, as common sense would dictate that popping anything will destroy it. Scientists believe that the hymen may once have existed, but this need to pop hymen may have caused the extinction of the species.

Legend has it that the hymen used to hide between the legs of young women, who were given the title "Virgin", but prolonged searches by medical examiners, warriors, music stars, artists, football players, and those intimately knowledgeable about women, have proven unsuccessful. There have been rumours that hymen exist in a lesbian tribe in a remote hill country of the inner Zambezi. Many attempts were made by brave men to get there, but eventually all were found, driven totally mad, not from the heat or mosquitos or isolation, but due to the fact that the women are so ugly.

Those men that claim to have tracked one down and broken it, have been proved to be bragging, and their credibility is destroyed as soon as the "carrier" or "Virgin" was examined. Usually, these "virgins" admit that any hymen they may have had was lost years previously.

In the meantime, many men intend to continue their search for a hymen, and all have to spend the rest of my life doing so, but some will die very happy in the attempt!

Important Notice[edit]

A reward has been posted by Keith Richards (Rolling Stones) for the discovery and proof of a hymen, but so far, no one has been able to show him one. His search continues.

The largest reported hymen was Hymen Roth, a Jewish hymen that could be found in Miami. Hymen Roth had ties to organized crime, but was never trusted by the Italians. Hymen was eventually "popped".

Error creating thumbnail: File missing
This one can sing