IPod Invisa

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Jump to: navigation, search
The original drawing for the first prototype of the iPod Invisa.
An Apple dealer showing off the new iPod Invisa. When this picture was taken, the iNvisa had been released for 0.2 of a milli-second.

The iPod iNvisa was released on December 23, 1973. The iPod iNvisa was created when Steve Jobs drew a detailed drawing of a new iPod product, one free of the clunky 'interfaces' of past designs, sporting an elegantly clean design. The product was to be called the iPod iNvisa. As you can plainly see in the schematics (pictured right), Jobs revolutionized the MP3 player market by adding a high-definition television screen, a 600TB hard drive, a satellite radio and TV receiver, seven shortwave bands, toothpick holder, rechargeable battery that had a life of over sixteen years on one 13 second charge with constant usage and Pong.

Release[edit]

As usual with Steve Jobs, he ordered Apple to have a gigantic release party. So, they put a card table in the Cupertino Civic Center and served cheap Frapucinos before the big release on the rented cardboard stage last used during a showing of Rugrats on Ice. All 14 visitors were taken aback by the new iPod's stunning size, scarcely larger than a Sodium atom, and its beautiful case-design, reminiscent of the Infinium Lab's Phantom Gaming Console.

Sales[edit]

The Invisa hasn't sold as quickly as most of the iPod series. A grand total of zero products have been said to have been sold, but Apple claims this report is wildly inaccurate and is based on flawed sales tracking methodology. The iPod iNvisa is notoriously difficult to track sales for, mainly because sales are so hard to find. Apple has recommended that sales be counted by calculating the total possible number of sales that could have been made at any time.

What people are saying[edit]

“iAlicia”

~ OW

“I just loooooooove my Invisa! It's a girl's best friend. I'm going to go show it to my gay friend”

~ Carol Channing on iPod Invisa

“The iPod iNvisa has no clothes!”

~ Bill Gates on iPod iNvisa

“What? The damn thing doesn't come with any Bryan Adams or Rush on it? This is just aboot BLASPHEMY!”

“The coolest thing ever! That is, if I can find the damn thing! I'm gonna call Steve Jobs tomorrow and tell him to find it for me.”

~ Linus Torvalds on iPod iNvisa

What apple has said towards feedback[edit]

“We cannot believe the utter and complete faggotry that we have received as feedback, it's so poor. We thought that the Invisa would be an instant hit, and revolutionise the mp3/mp4 technology screen. But we've created a whole new social group; the Invis-AHMEEGAWD!!!111's. They're all nerdy girls who think gays are their best friends, when all there after is a quick shag with their boyfriends and mutant mice who have developed the mastery of the english language. Thanks a lot guys, we thought you liked us the most. Oh, and by the way; Us, Apple, are making a few changes. Well, actually, it's just one really. We're soon going to be pynApol, yeah, we wanted to be more original, so we even changed the spelling to make it more hip. Oh crap, poptarts are done. KTHX!”

~ Apple on iPod Invisa feedback