James Last

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James Last (April 17 1829February 29 2012) was a German easy listening composer and bandleader, and covert government assassin.

Born Fiet First in Fucking, Last was killed in what was officially recorded as a "bizarre accident with his conductor's baton". Many believe this explanation to be a cover story, and that he was, in reality, taken out by his former secret-service employers in order to prevent him from ever relasing another album.

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