James Ried

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James Ried

Early life


History


Teaching career


The rest of his miserable old life



Early Life Born in B.C. 30000, James Ried Invented, among other things, fire. As impressive as this seems it pales in commparison to his inventions of: AIDS, Homosexuality, Eating, Kitten Huffing, and Kieth Richards. His parents rewarded him by frequent beatings with a whale carcass. Therefore in the year 1036 he took his bottled up anger out on the island resort of Pompeii just by pissing into Vesuvious. This was the start of his evil career.

History...contenued from early life. After his small incident at Pompeii he took an intrest in politics under the sur name Julius Caesar. While thought to be assassinated he was discovered to be indestructible and paid some dumbass to take his place. A few (hundred) years afterwards he witnessed the crusifiction of Jesus which drove him to Emoism and the hatred of Jews which he would later show under the false name of Adolf Hitler in what would be known as the Holocaust.

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