James watson

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James Watson was born in 1953 somewhere in Adelaide, South Australia. At the age of seven he was accepted into Oxford University, where he showed, with Einstein, that light travels at the square root of the speed that your fingernails grow.

James Watson, along somebody who may have been called Francine, made the discovery that life cannot be reduced to mere science stuff. He provided convincing proof in the form of a spiritual healing helix, DNA, that some kind of magic is in fact behind it all. This magical force has been attributed to either God or Chuck Norris.

DNA and Watson[edit]

DNA stands for Dreamy Night-time Apparatus, and is placed above the beds of alternative, attention-hungry people. It was this fact that lead to James Watson regreting ever having invented DNA. This is why in 1992 he uninvented it, much to the satisfaction of Richard Dawkins, who never liked the idea of magic.