January 20: Nobody edit Uncyclopedia Day Or Else
Why do I get my Hopes up?
- 1492 - Columbus becomes president of America.
- 1937 - The 20th Amendment is passed, forcing all presidental candidates to compete in a 100-meter dash to decide the primaries. Surprisingly, Franklin D. Roosevelt is the first president to win this event.
- 1942 - The Nazi Party gives the final solution to the "Jewish question", though the Jews insist that they were just asking for directions.
- 1984 - Armies of Oceania defeat Eurasian armies in the Congo.
- 1988 - Everybody ignored this holiday.
- 1992 - Governer Bill Clinton beats Paul Tsongas in the primaries. Investigations as to whether or not Clinton bit part of Tsongas's ear off in the final stretch are launched.
- 2004 - Pinky and the Brain finally take over the world, and are then killed by Joe Cartoon in a blender.
- 2007 - People are still intent on ignoring this holiday.
- 2008 - No-one has edited Uncyclopedia! Until I just did. Oh shit.
- 2009 - International Change Day. Citizens of the 'Homeless Undead'-ridden Californian cities get a day of reprieve from demands for change as the masses of change-hungry 'Zombos' are distracted by a change of power in Washington
- 2010 - Some n00b edits Uncyclopedia.
- 2300 - after leaving earth after 2012, humans finally get to the only safe planet, uranis.
- 2301 - finally people decide to wipe uranis clean of those mean little stinky brown blobs.