Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/January 4

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January 4: International day of Schadenfreude

What will this get me?
  • 1 - People get bored of noting that it's the n th day ever and abolish the calendar.
  • 1642 - The government of Japan introduces the country's first paper money, which is lighter and more convenient than the traditional, bulky coins. Japanese prostitutes everywhere rejoice.
  • 1666 - The Great Fire of London begins as the Christmas decorations are taken down too close to a naked flame.
  • 1974 - The second coming of Christ faces serious setbacks almost a year after the Supreme court rules on Roe v. Wade.
  • 1995 - Michael Jackson is kidnapped and forced to listen to his own music for seven consecutive days by his captors.
  • 2006 - A redundant event is added to Uncyclopedia's anniversaries.
  • 2009 - California Adventure and UC Irvine sign a treaty, but because Irvine was too busy playing Pokemon during negations, no one is sure exactly what the agreement is about.
  • 3265 - The Tooth Fairy is forced to resign after illegally selling children's teeth to hicks and not following the Parapluie Commandments.
  • 4412 - The first Twinkie expires. Mutant Horse-Men everywhere worry about their food supply.