Jimmy Buffet

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“Show me the Buffet!”

~ John Pinette on Jimmy Buffet

You may be looking for my lost shaker of salt and not even know it!

Jimmy tucking in to a freshly prepared buffet at a party, yesteday.

Whenever you go to a party you will always see Jimmy Buffett there, he is the guy who always has a plate piled high with cold chicken drumsticks, cold quiche, cold chilopatas and small triangular egg sandwiches. At the end of the night Jimmy can sometimes be seen filling a plastic shopping bag with what's left of the evening's snacks so that he can have them for lunch the next day.

In 1944 Jimmy Buffett was crowned buffet king of the year after he tucked in to a three ton buffet and polished the lot off in the space of three hours. Jimmy ate so much that he had to loosen his belt and have a sit down in his favourite chair.

He has also been called "Pretty Awesome" by an Anonymous source, however due to a law passed by President Chester A. Arthur it is only legal to play Jimmy Buffett songs during the summer except where allowed by local laws, currently only in Florida, California and New Orleans. Arthur was quoted saying, "Nobody wants to hear Margaritaville in February you idiot". If any Jimmy Buffett songs are played during the winter months the air temperature will rise to incredible temperatures and the mating season will begin for the animal kingdom.

Little did people know, Jimmy Buffett is Abraham Licoln's evil twin brother in disguise. The world was informed of this information after Jimmy was falsely accused by his twin of the murder of a prostitue when abe was found snorting coke out of the hooker's crack. Jimmy was sent of scoff free, after the court checked his alibi.

Jimmy Buffet was once considered to be a vulgar word, but it never catched on. BOB SAGGAT!!!!