Karori Wildlife Sanctuary

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A forest orca may sometimes visit Karori; then again, it may just be a member of Parliament in drag.

The Karori Wildlife Sanctuary was formed when a small group of visionaries saw a need for a large fenced enclosure just minutes away from the country's largest herd of dangerous animals.

The name is, in fact, a misnomer as it is a common belief that, after the Sanctuary contains the herd, the occupants will be subject to a similar level of political freedoms as Muslim strippers, Cuban capitalists and New Zealand landowners (See Resource Management Act).

It serves a secondary purpose as a Beaver sanctuary, where this exotic rodent can frolic freely and helps to fell all of the pest plants (See Rata)

The Fence[edit]

The Karori Wildlife Sanctuary fence, a 20-foot, electrified buttress manned at all times by armed guards, was completed in August 1999, just four months before Helen Clark became Chief Comrade of New Zealand.

The timing of these events is proof of the excellent vision of the Sanctuary founders; the Clark government is now in it's third term and the Sanctuary staff are busy with contingency plans for complete containment of the herd should the reign extend for a fourth term.


Recent spy reports in Mordor have indicated that Saurumon has once again decided to invade Middle-Earth. The retarded Labour govnerment has decided to evacuate the entire population of wellington into the fence encloser to protect the people. Lead by Jack Bauer and 300 Spartans, the fence is now the final stronghold protecting humanity from getting raped by the hordes of orcs AKA.Destiny Church.

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