Koopa Troopa

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For those without comedic tastes, the "questionable parody" of this website called Wikipedia think they have an article about Koopa Troopa.

A warrior general in the Nintendo Entertainment System and also one of the foremost current promoters of the Street Fighter 2 Discipline.


Biography[edit]

Koopa Troopa was born in the early 1980s in the Mushroom Kingdom. Little else is know about him except:

Mortal Enemies[edit]

  1. Mario
  2. Luigi Mario
  3. Toad
  4. Princess Toadstool (aka Princess Peach)
  5. Yoshi
  6. non-koopa Turtles
  7. Your mom

8: Wario (As of Super Mario 64 DS) 9: Waluigi 10: Samuel L. Jackson (He have had it with those mother f***ing sna... Koopas.)

Strengths[edit]

Over the centuries, Koopa Troopa has mastered the art of the Street Fighter 2 Discipline in the Nintendo Entertainment System. He has also developed other personalized skill sets to fight his enemies. (See Finishing Moves for a more complete listing of all Finishing moves available across all platforms.)

  1. Koopa Troopa is able to take his body armour and hurl it at his enemies. This is a technique that took two full seasons of Common Standard Time to develop. The regimen included vigorous exercise, and a long study of how hockey players pull the shirts off of other hockey players and then punch them in the face.
  2. The art of camouflage has been one of Koopa Troopa's greatest strengths. He is well versed in changing his shell colour from red, to green, to blue, to yellow, to a multi-colour flashing type deal.
  3. Flight. Koopa Troopa has figured out how to affix small white wings to his body armour. These allow him to fly, but only in certain patterns. Koopa Troopa can fly either up and down in one place, or in a wave like pattern. Unfortunately, there are no other patterns these wings can handle, because they are based on Old Tech (like that wind-up shoe you could jump in, or the argument of Racoon Tail v. Super Mario Cape), probably from around 1800. On a side note, during the 4th Age of Mario, Koopa Troopa developed a Super Mario Cape which allows him a much more controlled flight. Though, he cannot fly for the extended periods of time that he could with the wings. Also, when using this cape, he cannot use his body armour.
  4. The Art Of SCUBA. Koopa Troopa has developed an invisible Sophisticated Complicated Underwater Breathing Apparatus after many long years of holding his breath. This device allows him to breathe underwater for an unlimited amount of time, though it was so heavy that it did not allow him to swim, because it was also based on Old Tech.
  5. Farting. Oh boy,his fart smells worse than Marios and Warios. After farting for a long time,They take their own poop and chuck it at Bowser.

Weaknesses[edit]

The Main Weakness of Koopa Troopa is jumping on his head/back. When young, K.T. (as he would have his friends' call him) thought it was best hide inside his body armor, but in his older age (During the 4th Age of Mario) he figured out that it was much better for him to pop out of his body armor, so he could use some of his Street Fighter 2 Discipline moves on you. Though, when not in his body armor, Koopa Troopa is very vulnerable to an attack. Koopa Troopa is also vulnerable to fireballs thrown at him, and to a lesser extent, whacks from a racoon tail or from his Super Mario Cape after you steal it from him. (Of course you could kill him if you had a Invincibility Star but that would be cheating right?)

Merchandise[edit]

With special skillz and a large fan base, Koopa Troopa was approached by Nike to release his own line of sports footwear. Within 64 weeks the 'Koopa Air' shoe was released, along with an aggressive advertising campaign that targeted children aged 25 and up. Along with banners, posters, TV spots and a golden ticket in special packs of Bonjella; Koopa Troopa made a special appearance in the cult hit sit-com Mario Kart 64. Sadly, that particular PR stunt ended badly.

On the set of Mario Kart 64, Koopa Troopa entered a poker game with his sworn enemies on live television. With his anger clouding his judgement, he foolishly laid down a hand of 2 twos and a pokémon card he received from 'Shigsy' in exchange for an undisclosed favour.

See Also[edit]

SUPER MARIO TEMPLATE
Protagonists MarioPrincess PeachToad
Russia mario.jpg
Antagonists Donkey KongGoombaWario
Luigis Gay LuigiMama Luigi (Luigi's sojournMagic balloon)Weegee
Locations Mushroom KingdomAnother Castle®Yoshi's Park
Games Mario PartySuper Mario BrothersSuper Mario World
Whatnot Getting pushed into bananas (Mario Kart)Magic mushroomMariologyRaccoon Tail v. Super Mario CapeThe Mushroom Kingdom (band)