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For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Krillin.

“Are you sure about that?”

~ Shen-long the Eternal Dragon on wishing Krillin back to life
Krillin, wondering why his friends continue to wish him back with the Dragon Balls

Krillin (also spelled Kurririrn, Kullinin, Kurlinlin, and Karen) is widely regarded as the most useless human to ever exist. Krillin generally acts as comic relief, but fails at that as well due to his sheer amount of worthlessness. Krillin is bald and has six dots on his forehead. The meaning of this is unclear, but is assumed to be some symbolization of his aforementioned worthlessness.

Early Life[edit]

Krillin was born as the asexual offspring of Bob Saget. School was rough for Krillin, being sent to the nurse's office repeatedly after the pre-schoolers beat him up everyday well into High School. After years of incredible homosexual molestation from his father, Krillin moved out of his house to pursue a better life. Krillin wanted to be a fighter of great renown.Being under the impression that anything is possible if you believe in yourself Krillin began to pursue his goal. Krillin was under the wrong impression.

Krillin was taken under by the renowned hentai collector, Master Roshi. It was here that Krillin met his first friend Goku. The three of them had furious circle jerks on a daily basis, until Roshi felt that their training was complete. During his time spent there Krillin perfected his signature technique, the Penis Disc, which has never been able to help him once in any battle, due to the fact that he gets beaten up every 2 seconds into a fight.

Fighting Career[edit]

Krillin 2 seconds after fighting a Magikarp.

After his training with Master Roshi, Krillin decided to enter 234th Tenka'ichi Budōkai. He was brutally beat to within inches of his life, three consecutive times. However, this did not deter Krillin. As he continued his tournament participation he managed to break every single bone in his body at least once. Unlike the Saiyans, who become stronger after near-death experiences, Krillin remained the same. After suffering countless beatings, Krillin vowed to assist his friends in the fight to save the Earth. While the Z fighters faced many villainous villains like Radish, Vegeta, Nappa, Freezer, Cell, and Buu, Krillin cheered them on from the sidelines. Sadly, Krillin still managed to be the first to die every time. Krillin is the weakest of the Z fighters besides Chiaotzu.


Krillin, with his incredibly hot wife.

Failing to have a notable performance at any event relating to anything notable, including suicide, Krillin started to spend his days curled up into the fetal position in the corner of his non-existent house, sobbing in a mess of his own urine and feces. The stench was so abhorrent that it caused Android 18's circuits to malfunction as she passed by one day. In a laughable twist of fate, Android 18 fell in love with Krillin. Krillin acted upon this without hesitation and, not caring about how intercourse between androids and humans worked, married Android 18 immediately. They had their first daughter, who's name nobody remembers, shortly afterwards. Krillin never did figure out how sex between androids and humans worked.


Krillin was killed by Freeza , but was later wished back by the dragon balls.

See Also[edit]