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Laaandaaan be da cappel uh da U-NOI'ed Kinggom. It aweso be da ci'y dat gots uh mos' papal in dat mess o guntries in Europe what done fawmed one dem dere Intuhnash'nul Auggie-zations. A bloak aw dame from eeestaaan Laaandaaan be call a Cockernee.
Laaandaaan makes 17% uh da stuff made in da UK, ‘n be one uh da walled's bigges' ploices for bizzus, bawly-icks ‘n coacher. Laaandaaan be one uh da walled's leadin' ci'ies in bikin' bread, bawly-icks, tawkin', fun stuff, clo'es ‘n all dat awtsy-fawtsy nawnsense. Laaandaaan be one uh da walled's faw bigges' global ci'ies (along wid dat place in America wheah da yanks be maw obnoxious 'an us'al, one uh dem Awrien’al ci'ies 'n dat place in France where da frogs be maw uppity ‘n snobbish 'an us'al).
Laaandaaan gots 7.5 million papal ‘n iss metty-pol'tin airy-yer gots between 12 ‘n 14 million papal. Laaandaaan's papal come in all soizes, shoipes, couluhs, ‘n what not, makin' it one uh da mos' cozzie-pol'tin, voibrant ‘n enuhgetic ci’ies on erff. Ova 3'un'red languages be spoken in Laaandaaan, but da propuh Queen's English loike I be speakin' now is da only one dat caints.
Laaandaaan be da 'ome uh many global auggie-zations, insie-tutions ‘n comp'nies, ‘n as such retains iss leadin' role in walled affairs. A ci'y where cu'in'-edge mates tradittin, Laaandaaan is a major torrays desi-ation ‘n uh intuhnash'nal transpawt 'ub. It 'as lots uh impaw'ant buildin's ‘n oiconic lan’mawks, includin' walled-famous muze-ims, theeduhs, consut 'alls, garries, eah-fawts, staid-jums 'n bally-sez.
Unloike mos' cappel ci'ies, Laaandaaan's sta'us as da Cappel uh da UK never done been gran'ed aw made uhficial — by stashute or in writin'. It done been made da Cappel by Consie-doosh'l Covenshun, moikin' iss position as de facko Cappel a paht uh da UK's unwritten consie-doozhin.