Lake Superior

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A member of the famed Motown Group The Gratelakes. Originally a soloist from Minnesnowta, Superior migrated to Michigan via Wisconson. Reported to have familial ties to Canadiens, Superior renounced all such ties with his single "Carry On, Tear We Owe Some", which was also a hit with the 1970s supergroup Arkansas.


Average Temperature[edit]

Most people have a temperature of 98.6 degrees, Superior's average temperature is 50 degrees. This is almost a portion of the average. Important reasons cause this phenomenon, but it has not affected his career in any way. It can therefore be forgotten as trivia.

Early Years[edit]

Young Lake Superior knew he had a talent for music while still in the womb. He was drumming on his mother's bladder soon after his stubby fingers formed. At birth, the Doctor proclaimed him a Superior talent, and the name stuck. The Doctor had no idea that Superiors father was once a member of a band named the Superior Rogers Trio. Since the invention of the boat, Superior has had a sweet-tooth for them. Superior has eaten more boats, ships, and airplanes than the pop group Bermuda Triangle.

The Sixties[edit]

Superior with fellow Gratelakes and an unnamed Tribute band

Young Superior first hit the coffee houses of Minneapolis, often being thrown out as a beatnick vagrant before a generous Italian pastaman gave him a pile of scraps to eat out back. Years later he remembered this act of kindness when he wrote the David Bowie classic, Jean Jeno. Finally getting his place, he had moderate success as a solo artist but soon suffered from writers block. His move to Motown and joining the Gratelakes, is what made him the performer he is today. Playing on the mnemonic H. is for Huron, O is for Ontario, M is for Michigan, E is for Erie and S is for Superior: HOMES (Hey hey we're the Gratelakes) rocketed the young group to superstardom. A television show was modelled after their crazy antics. Later, dissolutioned with Lake Ontario and his Canadien baggage, Superior struck out on his own in 1964.

The Seventies[edit]

Superior's solo career was most vibrant in the serene seventies. The famed Arab Oil Embargo allowed him to write most of his songs while waiting in gas lines. During this decade, he started is Anishinabidelic Period when he connected with an Indian Guru. Briefly he changed his name to Kitchi Gumi. He would later change it back when he regained his music publishing rights.

The Eighties[edit]

Superior became sodium sensitive during this period and suffered from endemic edema. He had to comb out all the locks of his beautiful Salte Saint Marie hairstyle. Freshly shorn, he regrouped with the Lake 5 as they were then known, with the addition of Lake Champlain of New York / Vermont. The number 5 was dropped, and a stylistic "S" was used in its place, as they embarked on an arena tour sponsored by Kitchen Bouquet. The tour was a dismal failure largely due to an illadvised tie in to Lotto America. Despite this, the "Windsor single" was a hit despite or because of the infamous "Princess Diana Cover" of the CD. This, quickly withdrawn, cover is one of the Hottest LakeS collectible out there.

The Nineties[edit]

This area intentionally left blank

The Naughts[edit]

In 2004 every single entertainer that had ever been on a Time-Life Cd Collection banded together to raise awareness of the unspeakable acts in Krgystan. 200 Percent of all the net proceeds of the downloads of this song were earmarked to be pledged to fight the atrocities o Robot Santa, occurring in Kyrgyzstan under the guise of aromatherapy.

The Song "We Are the Red States", was a huge download success, tying up the entire AOL network and caused the RIAA to drop all its lawsuits against Ripster, Kazan, and others. The success of that single inspired the LakeS to remake it as "Still the Red States" in 2005, and was adopted as the theme song by the Daughters of the American Red States.

Hit Singles[edit]


  • Carry On, Tear We Owe Some (1964)
  • Thunder Bay (1971)
  • Dulu(th) Summer Jam (1977)
  • Call Me Kitchi Gumi (1978)

With the Gratelakes (LakeS)[edit]

  • HOMES (Hey hey we're the Gratelakes) (1962)
  • Kai Winona Ding Dong (1963)
  • Dirty Stinking Windsor (1985)
  • Still the Red States (2005)

With the Supergroup CSA for Krygystan[edit]

  • We are the Red States (2004)

Gordon Lightfoot Collaborations[edit]

  • Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald - Lake Superior once sunk a boat just to inspire Gordon Lightfoot to write a song about it.

Covers by other Artists that became hits of their own[edit]

  • Thunder Road by Bruce Springsteen (a rewrite of "Thunder Bay")
  • Jean Jenie by David Bowie (a rewrite of "Jean Jeno")
  • Dulcimer Jam by Otis Cambellini (a remake of "Dulu(th) Summer Jam")
  • EMI by the Sex Pistols (a remake of "I am He")
  • Cats in the Cradle (a Remake of "my son is a lousy bastard")
  • Carry On Our Wayward Son by Arkansas (a remake of Carry On Tear We Owe Some)

See Also[edit]

The Great Lakes
Lake Erie - Lake Superior - Lake Michigan - Lake Ontario - Lake Huron
The Not-so-Great Lakes
Lake Titicaca - Lake Spooky - Lake Champlain