|The Former Socialist Republic of Lipsonia|
The National Flag of Lipsonia
|Motto||In Nuclear Fission We Trust|
|Official languages||Lipsonian English. And Pain.|
|Race||5% Lipsonian, 5% KGB, 90% Mutant Lipsonian.|
|Religion||Socialism, Communism and the Religion of LIPPS, INC.|
|Declared Independance||1999 (from USSR)|
|National anthem||Funky Town by LIPPS, INC.|
|Exports||Pain, Deformities, and also a large volume of Vaseline.|
|Official Cuisine||Tumour In Brine|
|National bird||Flightless, Wingless, Cancer-wracked Pigeon.|
|Ruling Party||Smog Party|
|Area||IT'S OVER 9000!!!! sq. km|
|Currency||The Lipsonian Lipenchoter (Sheep's Scrotum)|
|National Sports||Running from Mutants, and also Badminton|
“Lipsonia is a great place. Apart from the dangerous amount of nuclear activity, a great place.”
Yes. Here's a handy map!
Lipsonia is the only country in the world that has more nuclear power plants than non-mutant people. Lipsonians are very proud of this achievement and will often celebrate through the ancient art of salkaarg (turkey slapping). Why they do this is currently unknown, but they seem to rather enjoy it.
Will I need any vaccinations before visiting Lipsonia?
Lipsonia has often caused the
weary lucky traveller to receive a disease that hasn't even been discovered yet. Vaccinations are not necessary, because the only diseases you'll catch are the ones caused by exposure to nuclear radiation. If you wish to leave Lipsonia with the same amount of limbs you had upon entry, the following places should not be visited, as they are known to cause nuclear radiation poisoning;
- Hotels, Hotel Rooms
- All public areas
- Fast food restaurants
- Anywhere with the sign Varnaer: accch! (Warning: This sign will probably kill you)
If you feel woozy or sick at any time, it is only natural. Don't bother to see a doctor, as it will only result in amputation.
What language is spoken in Lipsonia?
Most surviving Lipsonian citizens suffer from lip deformations, and the Lipsonian language (traditionally English) sounds more like murmuring. Eg. "Pass me the cat, please Dora" becomes "Pissemecashe, Plora", or more commonly a coughing fit as most Lipsonians have heavily deformed lungs.
If you understand what any Lipsonian person is saying, it is recommended you visit doctor immediately.
What should I visit in Lipsonia?
Most people visit Lipsonia by accident, or as a means of suicide. If you are visiting purely for pleasure, there are few things to see or do. A visit to Lipsonia's capital, Footskria, can never go astray, as visitors never leave! (Either because their new found deformities prohibit them, or because they are dead.) Visiting one of the many nuclear power plants can also be a thrill, but don't bet that you won't be deformed in some way upon exit, because you will - it's the way things work.
Wait a minute, how can I be deformed if they have such excellent safety features in nuclear power plants?
The Lipsonian government's official stance on nuclear power plants is that they are 100% safe facilities, and so they deliberately remove all safety features from the designs, reciting the old Lipsonian proverb: Ich nein gaud, tellit getaucked (If it's going to cost more money, tell them to get f**ked). The government avoids liability for any deformation caused by stating that most Lipsonians are deformed in some way, and so if you are also deformed then you are now normal by Lipsonian standards - and also eligible for citizenship
What is the government like in Lipsonia?
Lipsonians recently voted in the 'Smog Party', a political party dedicated to furthering Lipsonia's nuclear power developments. The president of Lipsonia, and head of the Smog Party, is El Gorwe - a Lipsonian immigrant stolen from the streets of New York to govern this
horribly hopeless delightful country.
Should I Visit Lipsonia?
Honest answer- no. YES OF COURSE!