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Mickey pills - Helpful wonder drug, or mime killer?

Also known as "Mouse," "M," "Your Mom," or "Wang-Doodle", mickey's are an illicit and illegal drug that has one of the highest growth rates in America. Originally distributed by Disneyland-pharmacie's to cure dehydration in their costumed employees, mickey's have become a popular drug amongst the raver set. The rehydrating effect the pill provides helps young kids continue to dance poorly and repetitively into the night [Much like other drugs we are all familiar with], effectively negating the effects of the massive Ecstacy-overdose they just shoved down their filthy gullet, and the kitschy nature of the pills design appeals to their mindless commercialism.

While initially viewed as harmless, mickey's were made illegal in the aftermath of the Just Say No-campaign put on in 1992. It's hard to remove the drug from the streets, however, because of its high level of collectability. Everybody loves Mickey Mouse!

It's also the name of a song created by Toni Basil to accompany the music video for a pair of insane kids who were high on said drug at the point of the song's creation and imagined a bunch of cheerleaders dancing around for no reason, hence the 1982 song "Mickey".

Indeed, Mickey HAS blown their minds, as is claimed by their mindless chanting.

The Effects of Taking a Mickey[edit]

The first time you have sex with Mickey, your head will start to spin and you will find yourself naked in the middle of a field with the word cumshot written across your face. MICKEY MOUSE IS A HUGE WIGGA NIGGA. I would just hate to point out that this is not a hallucination, as the next 4 times you take it the same thing will happen, except the word will change to woogalwangwee, cinghiitresit, mondaseeeryt and urafukindumas but after that when you take it you will find yourself in a far away place called Disneyland Paris where people will say cumshot instead . If you are over the height of three inches you will not like this and will want to get out of bed, but a few weeks later, every boner will ache and you will need another boner and so it goes on and on until erection occur.

Places of use[edit]

Often found at teenagers "sex parties", or in your mother's underwear drawer, Mickeys are considered extremely dangerous especially to little brothers, looking around for all the drugs to take. Mickeys also have a clinical use, doctors sometimes use mickeys to treat "Post traumatic stress disorder" or QRDF. Doctors only prescribe this in extreme cases, and highly forbid giving these to addicts. Addicts are extremely noticeable, and exhibit weird behaviors like sudden uncontrollable bladder, profuse vomiting, insufferable insomnia, and crackheadedness.