Moo (Monster Rancher)

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Moo is the town drunk of the popular TV series, Monster Rancher. He is not very talkative; the only thing he ever says is "A ha ha ha ha!"

Moo was created by a sinister conjurer named Maloja. He was created to take over the world for him, but Moo got tired of taking orders, and killed Maloja by stoming on him.

A war was already being fought, between fans of Pokemon and fans of Digimon. Moo obviously thought Monster Rancher was better than both awesome shows, so he waged war on Pokemon fans and Digimon fans. He proved to be too much of a serious threat, so the Pokemon fans and Digimon fans put aside their differences and teamed up. They used the power of Pokemon and Digimon, and combined it to form a powerful creature called the Phoenix! The Phoenix fought Moo in a showdown of epic proportions. King New York, head of the Pokemon army, and David of Lork, head of the Digimon army, constructed a Digiball, combining the technology of Pokeball and Digivice, and transformed Moo into a CD.

Much later, a Jedi Knight named Anakin Skywalker found the CD hidden in a temple, and when he tried to play it on his diskman, Moo possessed Anakin, and became an almost-human form in gold armor! Anyone in the Star Wars galaxy referred to him as Darth Vader.

Moo began to seek out the Imperium Silver Crystal so he could return to his original body, which lie frozen in Eternal Sleep in a cave somewhere. Moo also got four servants named Regulus, Artemis, Sirius, and Orion. But nine people were out to destroy a ring of power, and they fought Moo's servants. Regulus was defeated and chose to switch sides. Artemis was instantly killed by a swordsman of the nine, who was destined to become a king. Sirius was revealed to be the brother of the weak man among them, and they fought. Sirius mortally wounded Boromir, but Boromir managed to decapitate Sirius before dying. Afterward, the gang confronted Orion and injured him. Orion was hanging onto the edge of a cliff overlooking the lava, and he let go and fell to his death.

At the exact moment of Orion's death, Moo returned to his original body. While the Fellowship ventured toward Mordor, Moo summoned a powerful knight named Dimentio to take out the Fellowship, but Dimentio betrayed Moo and tried to take the Silver Crystal himself! Dimentio then had an encounter with Sauron, the forger of the ring of power, ending with Dimentio killing Sauron by throwing the ring into the lava, and Moo in turn shot down Dimentio in his ship as a punishment for his betrayal, and Dimentio perished in a ball of flame.

Moo attacked the Fellowship at the Ice Cave, but an elf named Galadriel told them to fuse four addicted hobbits together to form the Phoenix. Pippin smokes too much, Merry drinks too much, Sam eats too much, and Frodo petted the ring too much. So Gandalf used his magic to fuse the hobbits together into the Phoenix! The Phoenix fought Moo, and Moo was so disappointed that the Phoenix had returned that he decided to end it all. When the Phoenix grabbed onto Moo and drained his energy, Moo selfdestructed, killing the Phoenix.

Attempted Resurrection in the Fourth Age[edit]

Later, the Wicked Witch of the West and her husband, Emperor Palpatine, attempted to resurrect Moo, but they were stopped by the timely intervention of some heroes. C-3PO threw a bucket of water over Palpatine, killing him, and the munchkins threw the Wicked Witch of the West into the main reactor of the Death Star. Thus, Moo remains in Hell, writing English essays and watching educational television.

Alleged sightings[edit]

At least three people have claimed that they saw a black, red, and white dragon with goat horns flying by. The first was really hung over, so whether or not he really saw Moo was questionable. The second was a nutjob who had escaped Smith's Grove Asylum, and he was immediately placed back in the nuthouse. The third was a man who thought the plural of "goose" was "sheep", and was chastised by his wife, Lois, for telling the city that a bloodthirsty dragon who was supposed to be dead had returned.


Before the war, Moo is said to have married a woman named Emerald who was transformed into a dragon by a doom phantom. Eventually they had a child, whom they called Shruikan. Emerald later watched Saw III in a theater overlooking a dark hole called The Void. She fainted watching the brain surgery scene and fell into The Void, and was killed when she fell in there. After the death of Moo, Shruikan joined forces with a murderer named Cyrus the Virus, and attempted to avenge the death of his father by killing Gandalf. When he learned that Moo did kill himself, Shruikan speared Cyrus's leg and threw him into a rock-cutting machine, which cut him to ribbons. Shruikan fell in love and married a female dragon named Saphira.