Ninja/Types

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A ninja teaches it's young how to hunt with a Spork.
A female ninja. Their strategy is not to sneak up on victims, like their male counterparts; they instead walk in plain view of them and attack them while helpless victim is hypnotised by her breasts.

In the beginning, there was nothing. Then, God created the ninja in His own image. He gave them dominion over the animals along with the power to be totally awesome and flip out all the time. The ninja were a pure and proud race for two thousand years, but soon enough, they were bored and got hooked on D&D, and decided to create ninja sub-classes. Types of Ninja is an attempt to document all of the ninja sub-classes that have been discovered.


The Nonja[edit]

You, because you have to look up the types of Ninjas. A true Ninja knows the rest by heart, as being born.

Stig Ninja[edit]

If you're happy and you know it...

The offspring of Lord Stig and Kasumi, The Ninja Goddess. The Stig Ninja comes form the Land of Speed (also known as The Top Gear Test Track). The Stig Ninja can clone himself into an entire clan just by drinking High Octane Fuel. The Stig Ninja is considered by many Ninjas to be a God. The Stig Ninja can drive cars at incredible speeds, speeds so fast that they can stop a Ninja Master dead in his tracks. The only things Stig Ninjas hate is when someone talks about Peugots, Fiats, Renaults and Citroens. These cars anger the Stig Ninja and his mission in life is to destroy anyone who owns one of those cars, talks about one of those cars, or is seen driving one of those cars, the other thing a Stig Ninja hates are Neds and Chavs. Stig Ninjas kill Neds and Chavs on site. According to a Ninja Historian, one Stig Ninja called Neds and Chavs a skidmark on the underpants of society. Stig Ninjas are usually seen wearing their traditional white race suit but Ninja Scientists have discovered that the ancestor of The Stig Ninja wore a black race suit. The Stig Ninja's weapons (cars) usually have 4 wheels and can go very fast. If you see the Stig Ninja, bow down and worship him.


Fierce Pink Ninjas[edit]

Sporkerella.jpg

Fierce Pink ninjas run around in pink ninja outfits. They are known to be cute but deadly. Praying to their god, Hello Kitty, they get horrible emo powers of deadliness.

Perhaps, one of the best examples of a Fierce Pink Ninja is that of the ninja-mistress known as Sporkerella (shown at the right). Rumors have it that she has been reaping havoc upon the state of Texas, with many sightings in the City of Houston. One report in particular is terrifying. Apparently, she killed a large crowd of people using cuteness in the form of a Hello Kitty effigy. Strange ninja magic indeed.

Note: Fierce Pink Ninjas are also known as scenekids. Beware.


Orange Ninja[edit]

Despite their titles as Ninja, Orange Ninjas are actually quite unstealthy, and are more notable for their prominent abilities to speak in obnoxious voices, and be as annoying as ninja-ly possible. However, the bright orange jumpsuits of this particular breed makes them excellent traffic cones.

Santa[edit]

Santas are actually a family of ninjas, who have taken an age-old tradition to go through every single person in the world's house simultaneously once a year, to rid it of ghosts and pirates. Every generation of Santa Ninjas, one is chosen do this until death. The facts of Santa being a ninja are as follow: -He goes to every house in the world at once. Only Ninjas, Chuck Norris, and Jessii can do that. -Santa isn't fat, it's a lie spread by his enemies to make him seem weak. -His suit is stained red with the blood of said enemies.

Tongan Ninja[edit]

Can be found in the motherland of Tonga, But when you find him, he will kill you then seduce your mother then drink a nice chocolate beverage.

McNinjas[edit]

A family of Irish Ninjas that escaped the great American Ninja purges of the Great Dane. The McNinjas consist of Dr. McNinja, Dan, Mitzi, and Dark Smoke Puncher. Dr. McNinja is a ninja doctor, driven by dual compulsions to kill and to heal, making him rather conflicted, and interesting to be around. Dan and Mitzi are just ordinary ninjas. Dark Smoker Puncher is a blinja, with a penchant for robotics. [1]

Ninja Pirate Zombie Robot[edit]

Npzr-splash.jpg

The paradox of ninjaness. Being part Pirate and Part ninja this monstrosity is feared by Ninjas knowing someone breached the Ninja code and mated with a Pirate (nothing shows in the Ninja code about mating with a Zombie). Be cautious, because of their Ninja / Pirate / Zombie / Robot nature these creatures are highly unpredictable. The Robot side resulted when a Ninja was robbing Tech N9ne and a escaped Nanite binded with their DNA....AND THERE ALSO REALLY GREAT DANCERS!!! ......*cough*

Rainbow-Ass Ninja[edit]

A rare form of ninja only found in California. Also called the Butt Monkey Ninja, the Technicolor Mofos, MnM and Dem' Stupid Sasquatch Ninjae, and the Re-Re Power Rangers. These ninji are made most popular by the game based off of the 3rd sequel of Barnie With Friends, Mortal Kombat. These ninji are known to have retarded powers obviously copied from popular cartoons such as The Backyardigans: Charlie and Lola, Dora the Explorer and Little Einsteins: The Aryon Ninja. They each have died about 4 times only to return on a quest for constipation...

Electrinja[edit]

The electrinja is related to the cyber ninja, but only because they are temporarily adopted into the family. They create and power anything electronic, with their unholy hatred. They come in several types, such as worker, drone, and soldier. Beware of the soldiers, as they will jump out of the power sources of any electronics, or the electronics themselves, and instantly convert the electronics into a deadly weapon. They are controlled by the artificial Electronic Ninja.

Blinja[edit]

Blinjas are ninjas that believe in the holy idol, Bling.

Unlike conventional ninja, blinja don't vie toward stealthy assassination. Instead, their primary method of murder is to blind the foe with as much flashy, tawdry objects of adornment as possible. This not only served to perform the aforementioned purpose, but heavy adornment is thought to bring them to the supreme state of blingdom, also known as bling-bling.

They ride horses and camels and eat radish all day whilst on a dinky bike they got from Wal-mart which was made in China funding a communist country. They always wore clothing that were golden and shined bright like a diamond

Most blinjas have guns, but many will stun their foes further by performing the secret art of rap. This is available to but a few of the most elite. The rarest type of blinjas, the Albino blinja, who is capable of performing this act, is also known as a whigurre. However, most albinos are born inadequate and live lives of quiet desperation as their normal brothers (as they refer to each other) attain glory.

However, blinjas are not united behind one cause, and their rival factions have led to the murder of many great blinja warriors, including The Smurfs, Batman, and Tuvok.

Clinja[edit]

The last sight you'll ever see

Clinjas are a cross-breed of ninjas and clowns. Clinjas can frequently be found visiting malls, freeways, and smoking it up inside a small Volkswagen.

Approximately 90 clinjas can fit into one Volkswagen Beetle, 70 more than the maximum number of clowns. Clinjas, as the cross-breeds of ninjas and clowns, possess the extraordinary abilities of both races, and combine them to form Super Parties.

During parties, clinjas are a merry, happy species. To the chagrin of many parents, clinjas enjoy sneaking clinjalike into a random child's birthday party by breaking through the skylight on ziplines while honking handheld bicycle horns. Frequent activities include the traditional throwing of brightly colored balls at children. Such balls are known to contain various party favors such as Ricin, VX Nerve Agent, and free AOL software. The clinjas throw their balls with deadly accuracy, causing concussions, blood loss, AIDS, Hepatitis B, and naturally, plenty of laughter, giggles, and screams. Clinja adults and children never cease to enjoy the launch of projectile objects at an audience. Pin the Tail on the Donkey is another favorite game, resulting in only minor injuries in most cases. When Pin the Tail fails to stoke the audience's fervor, however, clinja families bring out the HaHaKatana. It is still unclear whether the aftermath of the HaHaKatana is the result of clinjas' natural hatred for all lesser forms of life, or simply a joke lost in translation.

When a party is over, usually the result of being busted by the cops, or the lack of attached heads, clinjas depart with a ceremonial bow and a flick off a thermal detonator. Many a city block owes the fine maintenance of roads to a friendly clinja clan.

Cyber Ninja[edit]

Cyber ninjas, such as the one about to kill you, are evil and incomprehensible. Luckily, we have Oscar Wilde!

Cyber ninjas can only affect the "real" world by getting high off virtual kittens, and "jacking off" into the "Styrofoam Cup". Within the "Cup", they have many awesome powers, such as the ability to bend soft plastic items, and the even more amazing power to obtain sudden knowledge about the application of high-tech laundry detergents.

When you meet a Cyber Ninja, your first thought may be...eh? That is because Cyber Ninjas are really sneaky and you may get the feeling that they're trying to tell you something, as if in a secret code or lingo that you don't know. It's very disconcerting.

They also tend to refer to someone called Bill Gates very often. Nobody knows why

It's all Greek to us.

The most famous of the Cyber Ninja is Sektor, everybody knows he's not actually a ninja, but if you try to tell him that, he turns your head into a bloody mist, so just call him one anyways.

Minja[edit]

A small person, or midget, who happens to be a ninja. Minjas can throw shurikens, then jump on top of it in mid-flight. So they'll hit you in the neck, and then punch you in the face while the shuriken hits your crotch. However, minjas are known to be very deadly, not because of thier fighting techniques and stealth ability, (they can fit into a pack of gum, jump out, and blow your capillaries up with their mind), but they are more so deadly due to thier innate cuteness. Minjas are quite cute, but it is unquestionably a bad idea to pick up a minja. Picking up a minja will result in your ass getting kicked in fourty seven different ways and THEN you will die. Catching them WILL NOT bring you a pot of gold, it will only bring you to your Death. One group of Minja who exploits this weakness in humans is known as the Minjachaun, who use psycho-transic mind lasers to make you think that you are seeing THEM as Leprechauns.

Ninja Monk Angel Nun[edit]

A NMAN.

“Holy shit, they're only the scariest things since Jedi Pirates.”

~ Miyamoto Musashi on Ninja monk angel nuns

The Ninja Monk Angel Nuns (NMAN) are a group of mysterious ninjas that descended from heaven to make God's favorite drinks. They have no comprehensible gender and thus are capable of being a monk and a nun at the same time.

The Ninja Monk Angel Nun leader, Henry Weinhard, is said to have been God's right hand. Literally, His right hand was removed and incarnated into an actual creature.

Their principal weapon is the lethal Nunchaku, made from two steel phalli joined by reinforced rosary beads. They are also known for snorting wasabi, turning their brains into gush and then removing it with a straw to store somewhere else whilst they are out being just plain scary.

Ninjew[edit]

The most deadly assassins for the Mossad, their shurikens are shaped like the star of David. They never kill on Saturday, but they do want to kill Mel Gibson.And they will beat your ass with level 420 krav maga and jewjitsu.

Ninja Pirate[edit]

An artists rendition of a ninja pirate.

A ninja pirate is the hybrid offspring of a female pirate and a male ninja. Since the ninja pirate is the only ninja sub-class to actually be superior to basic ninjas (as well as pirates), some argue that ninja pirates should be considered a ninja super-class. Ninja pirates should not be confused with pirate ninjas (pirinjas), the hybrid offspring of a male pirate and a female ninja, since they are actually inferior not only to ninja pirates, but to normal ninjas and pirates as well.

It is very rare to see a ninjapirate because ninjas and pirates hate each other. Immediatly after the two have made contact they will attack each other. A ninjapirate is born when during battle the male ninja tries to use his wang as a last resort weapon accidently striking the women pirate's "barrel of rum". The pregnate pirate will cease fighting and hybernate for 3 months long enough for the ninjapirate to nurse and grow strong enough for its first kill. It will leave its mother only to come back 2 years later and kill her.

It is speculated that there are about a dozen ninja pirates in existence and they are our certain doom, it is only a matter of time before they kill us all. Only one ninja pirate has ever been positively identified. His name was Vin Diesel, and he was killed only a few minutes after publicly admitting he was a ninja pirate. His mom is a white skinned, blue haired bonny lass and his dad is a tan skinned, black haired, shadowblade master.

Vampire Ninja[edit]

Spawned from Vincent Valentine and extremely prone to horrific killing sprees while feeding, Vampire Ninjas are the ultimate in stealth, able to literally blend into the shadows. They call upon a range of creatures to aid them, most notably their Ninja Bats, which are thought to be derived from the Beast of Caerbannog. They are also experts with all ninja weapons and have immaculate hair. The flimsier and gayer of the vampire ninjas also sparkle and are very hormonal.

Ginja[edit]

Contrary to popular belief, Ginjas, or Ginger Ninjas are indeed real, although very rare. In ninja camps, when a baby is born it is thoroughly inspected by a group of highly trained Minjas. If the baby ninja has red hair, it is shunned by its community and forced to live in the barren AZN plains. Several Ginja's fossilized remains have survived long enough for us to analyze them, thus proving their existence. Hayley Williams is a Ginja in disguise. She has super-secret 1337 Ninja Skills.

Cowboy Ninja[edit]

“Cowboy Ninja? What a stupid concept.”

~ Stanley the Ninja Pirate's famous last words.

Spawned only when a Ninja finds a gun, figures out how to use it properly, and kills a Ninja Cow with it (which, thankfully, is ungodly rare for all three to happen in sequence) Cowboy Ninjas are the most powerful beings in the Universe, outclassing all other Ninja. Cowboy Ninjas are true masters of Ninja stealth. So much so that no one can ever tell that they're Ninjas, not even other Ninjas. Most just assume them to be nothing more than Cowboys with swords, a misunderstanding that, if uttered out loud in earshot of a Cowboy Ninja, will result in a sword through the eye socket and a brutal ass-raping until death. Cowboy Ninjas are rumored to be the only beings on Earth that can withstand a Chuck Norris roundhouse to the face and survive. Cowboy Ninjas are cannabalistic to all other Ninjas, and Ninjas make up most of a Cowboy Ninja's diet. The Cowboy Ninja's main habitat is the American Southwest. There, it spends most of it's time devouring Klansmen, (which it mistakes for poorly disguised Ninjas, though, to a Cowboy Ninja, all other Ninjas are poorly disguised.) training it's cattle to sniff out Ninjas, and writing country music (solely for the purpose of causing people misery). It is unknown how many Cowboy Ninjas exist in the world, though three are speculated to be or have been Cowboy Ninjas: Chuck Norris (this is debatable due to the fact that he does not eat the Ninjas he kills) General William Tecumseh Sherman, and Adam West. All other Ninjas fear the Cowboy Ninja, and try to avoid them as much as possible. This is nigh impossible for them because a Ninja can never know who is a Cowboy Ninja and who is not. A Ninja's regular search for a Cowboy Ninja has been regularly been mistaken for "flipping out and killing people". If you are aware of a Ninja Cowboy in your community, alert the police so they can evacuate the city, bolt shut all entryways of your house, stack up on as many weapons as you can, and start writing your will, because when you discover a Cowboy Ninja's identity, you have exactly two days before the Cowboy Ninja appears in front of you and shoots you in the face. This is an act of kindness on the Cowboy Ninja's part. As a reward for being insightful enough to discover him, he gives you a quick, painless, non rape-filled death.

Origami Ninja[edit]

An Origami Ninja is a ninja that uses his mighty Origami skills to make mighty Ninja paper weapons. They first originated when the Japanese discovered that Origami can give some very nasty papercuts. And ever since the Emperor Icky Icky Icky Kapang Zoom Poing of the Ni Dynasty was mortally wounded by a paper potato, the practice of Origami weaponry has been outlawed. The many weapons (such as an Origami throwing star, or an Origami claw) hurt a little bit (and by "little bit" I mean more than 7 cups of blood), so you don't want to mess with an Origami Ninja (or his bitches). An Origami Ninja's weapons vary, and can include anything made out of paper,glue,cardboard or pie. However, the most prevalent weapon is a throwing star.

Ninja of the Animal Kingdom[edit]

Ninja Cow[edit]

No class of bovine is more skilled in the secret arts of stealth than the ninja cow. They were originally bred by the secretive ninja 4-H Cabal for their black milk, vital to the stealth of any ninja cookie break. However, they dissociated with human ninja and went their separate way due to their displeasure at the opening of the Ninjaburger franchise as well as the erratic ninja milking schedule.

Ninja cows tend to avoid interaction with humans, so, as they are ninja, little is known about them. They are exceptionally surreptitious for bovines. When fighting, they use their size and agility to their advantage, and are the only known type of ninja to develop a fighting style utilizing swords held in all four hooves. (How the swords are held in the hooves is as yet unknown to science.) The cud of the ninja cow is widely prized as a neurotoxin.

Unlike most cows, which prefer to spend their days in nice sunny pastures, ninja cows prefer to avoid such exposure, spending most of their leisure time in trees. Milking a ninja cow is a very dangerous operation due not only to the difficulty of finding one, but the sharp, throwing star-like udders.

Lesser known and even harder to find is the ninja bull, which is known to kill matadors the night before they are scheduled to enter the ring. Ninja bulls may have no honor, but they have a much higher survival rate than non-ninja bulls.

Despite their obvious similarities, there is no known scientific link between ninja bulls and luncha bulls.mistaken for "lunchables"

Penguinja[edit]

Pengunija preparing to FLIP OUT (artist's interpretation)

Penguinja, or ninja penguins, as they are more commonly known, are some of the most secretive and stealthy ninjas in existence. Some people claim that they don't exist, but that is only because ninja penguins are so good at hiding.

Wearing hoods to disguise their penguin-y appearance, they infiltrate your home while you're out and take up residence in your refrigerator, behind all the moldy leftovers that you're never going to eat. The next time you open your refrigerator, they leap out from behind the Tupperware and kill you using their secret Mad Ninja Skillz techniques. No one knows why they do this. Do they want something belonging to their victim? Are they assassins, hired by an enemy of the victim? Do they simply enjoy killing? Are they on a mission to eliminate people who don't clean out their refrigerators? It is a mystery which, sadly, shall probably remain forever unsolved, since most people who have seen a ninja penguin have not lived to tell the tale.

Skeptical? Beware, penguinja target disbelievers.

The best ways to prevent a Ninja Penguin from killing you are the following:

  • Leave an offering of fresh fish with marshmallows on your doorstep.
  • Never leave your house.
  • Clean out your refrigerator frequently, or, just don't own a refrigerator.
  • Buy or build a giant robot with which to defend yourself.
  • Throw disks of various Linux distros at it as a distraction.
  • Dump water on it or it will spit Acid out it's mouth!

However, none of these are foolproof, and many of these things have proved not to be an obstacle in the face of the penguinja's Mad Ninja Skillz.

Additionally, there's some sort of rubbish mulling about that penguinja aren't mammals. This is an obvious attempt to exclude them from the ranks of ninja by the Walrogues, their primary rivals. The Walrogue promote the idea that penguinjas are actually flightless birds. Penguinjas are not birds although they can fly.

Pirinja[edit]

A pirinja (a.k.a the kaizonobi) is the offspring of a male pirate and a female ninja. Rather than being superior to ninjas as their close cousins, the ninja pirates, the pirinjas are inferior. In fact, pirinjas are the most pitiful of all the ninja sub-classes.

Somehow the abilites of the pirate and the ninja cancel each other out when a male pirate and a female ninja mate, but multiply each others effects when a female pirate and a male ninja mate. Scientists are still trying to explain this phenomenon. The female pirinja is known as a piñata.

Recent studies have shown that when a Pirinja is killed, it has the ability to explode with the power of an atom bomb, but is only able to kill Ninjas and their various sub-classes. This is probably due to the release of the latent--yet unobtainable in life--power that Pirinja's hereditage contains. They have recently been classified as "The most dangerous of Ninja Sub-classes" due to this, and are currently being tested for military usage.

Another interesting observation that does not show up in other ninjas is that they seem to do many things WITH THEIR BARE HANDS.

Tasmanian Tiger Ninja[edit]

Believed to be involved in Extinction.

See: Tasmanian Tiger for further information

Ninja Lawyers[edit]

This particular type of ninja is known to be the snazziest dresser, or at least anyone saying otherwise often receives a libel-shuriken to the spine. Ninja lawyers only offer their services to the largest corporations and famous pirate haters like Batman, it is however a well known fact that Bill Gates has no Ninja lawyers on his payroll after he attempted to sue the pie-ninja responsible for the infamous pie-in-the-face incident.

Their methods include the ability to instantly settle damage cases as soon as they arise by decapitating the offenders. They will also viciously attack judges with objection-shuriken. However, in America, the infamous Fifth Amendment often hinders their business as their clients are unable to explain where their counsel is, besides 'everywhere'.

Choco-Ninjas[edit]

Ninja Golden Chocobo Breeding.PNG

A Choco-Ninja is a ninja who has infused Chocobo genes in their DNA. The Choco-Ninjas can increase their numbers extremely quick, but to get the highest rank, the Golden Choco-Ninja, you need to mate a great and a good Choco-Ninja with a carob nut. As a result, the green and the blue Chocobo are born. A green Choco-Ninja can climb mountains and a blue Choco-Ninja can walk on water (see Jesus). When a blue and a green Choco-Ninja have incest, a Pink Choco-Ninja is born. A pink Choco-Ninja can climb mountain AND run on water (see Jesus), but that's not all. If you mate the Pink Choco-Ninja with a Wonderful Choco-Ninja you get the final form of Choco-Ninja. The golden Choco-Ninja!

Nine Orifice Ninja[edit]

Ninja with Penguins attached to each orifice when striking the ultimate blow.

Were-Ninja[edit]

Normal people most of the time, who transform into ninjas at the New Moon. Anyone Ninjered by them during that time will become a Were-Ninja themselves. They temporarily gain all of the powers of the ninja that bit them, and develop an extreme desire for snorting wasabi and pwning all pirates in a 10 mile radius.

Injured Ninja[edit]

Actually, there's no such thing as an injured ninja. If you see an injured ninja, it's not a ninja. Just a wannabe dressed up like a ninja that got hurt while pretending to have ninja skillz.

Or, these guys.

Werepirateninja[edit]

The Werepirateninja is a mysterious mystery, as well as a legendary legend. An ancient creature of the modern world, it is afflicted by a curse which came from a downloaded version of the one they put on Princess Fiona in Shrek. You know, one of those day-night things.

During the day the Werepirateninja takes on the form of an ordinary Pirate. But upon sundown flips-out and transforms into a kick-ass Ninja.

Anatomy/Appearance[edit]

Werepirateninjas change shape and awesomeness depending upon the time of day. When they change there are usually really good special effects involving an exploding ring of energy.

Moments after the sparklies fade away, the Werepirateninja will often search around frantically, weapon drawn, for the Pirate/Ninja that was just there. If he is in Daytime-Pirate form you may talk to him, though you will likely be plundered or raped.

If he is in Nighttime-Ninja form then I would recommend getting the heck out of there! He's going to flip out and kill you in two and a quarter of a second!!

Total Eclipses[edit]

The horrific transformation caused by a total eclipse

During a total Eclipse, a Werepirateninja will assume the form of both a pirate AND a ninja simultaneously! This results in an epic battle in which whoever wins, we lose.

Current Research[edit]

With the increase in Internet Piracy, downloads of this curse are becoming more common. All Ninjas and Pirates are advised to abstain from downloading until a live specimen can be captured alive and a vaccine produced. Also, when flipping-out and killing hella dudes, ninjas are instructed to use a latex sheath over their katanas and ninja stars.

Debate[edit]

There is still some debate as to whether or not the pirate side of a ninja can actually succeed in the total eclipse struggle, since historically the ninja-side has been awesomer than the pirate-side and inevitably defeats the latter. However, due to Le Chatelier's Principle, newer bio-instances of the curse are generating robo-pirates that are coming close to matching the ninja. Be afraid.

Ninja Turtles[edit]

These are the most superior kind of Ninja and, coincidentally, the most inferior kind of turtle hybrid (Man-turtle really now? Bear-turtle is a different story). They wear none of the full niqab of other ninjas, and lack the longevity epitomising other breeds of turtle - all are teenage.

Ninja Turtles are extremely rare, as there are only four in the world. The best with names that end in O. These Ninjas are extreme to the most badass of badassness only topped by Ninjas who answer questions of the common wealth.

Nunjas[edit]

A nunja in a convent about to attack

Nunjas (or ninja nuns) are obviously a cross between ninjas and nuns. They were founded during the Crusades where they were used to kick Turkish pirates' asses because they were a threat to the Crusaders. The sacking of Constantinople was started by them when they sneaked into the walls and killed all the defenses. They are used today to protect the Pope from pirates and other ninjas because the Swiss Guards' outfits are too gay to protect him. Their weapon of choice are the nunchuks, which are basically 2 nuns tied together. , and their mom's whom are nuns are 25, their ninja dad's are 28.

Nanjas[edit]

Nanjas have embraced the technology of the 20th century to exert their influence in cyberspace and are responsible for a common coding error known to most as "not a number". Some believe this error is brought about by dividing by zero or taking the square root of a negative number, but this is nowhere near the truth. Anyone who actually believes this should kill themselves about...now. If you ever get this error, you can rest assured that your program cannot be salvaged, just scrap it and go cry in the corner like the wussy you are.

Nanja is also used to describe one if not all forms of geriatric female ninji. These are perhaps the most diabolical of ninja. The result of surviving for so many years is perfectly honed skills capable of making the simplest daily tasks arduous to the point that the victim will suicide, also the ability to completely incapacitate groups of people through the ancient art of the Circulisticallory Story -most commonly implemented at the head of a long queue, or where there is little if any escape from having to hear the story. These skills are highly desired by lesser aged ninjas for diversionary acts.

Finnjas[edit]

Very similar to the common ninja, but born in Finland. Besides inferior camouflage due to blonde hair, they also have a secret language which no outsider has ever deciphered: Japanese spoken with a Scandanavian accent. Sometimes called Fjord Ninjas. Renowned for their secret welfare state social policy and relative isolation from pirates. Many Finnjas are also communists.

Yellow Ninjas[edit]

Yellow ninjas all fight out in the open and have skulls for faces. They can all shoot spears from their hands while yelling "GET OVER HERE!" and pulling their target towards themselves.

Cheese Ninja Warriors[edit]

Commonly known as CnW9. They are ruthless communists sworn to protecting cheese at all cost. They're quite possibly insane.

The Cheese Ninja Warriors are among the most infamous of all Ninja's; due to the fact that they do not show remorse for other Ninja's. Of any kind. Ever.

MSN Ninjas[edit]

These ninjas use the ancient and very powerfull art of "Appearing Offline." They are very dangerous and can suddenly attack you with words when you least expect it. These ninjas also have a power similar to the "nudge", it is called "the machine gun." Very similar to the nudge, but it shoots .50 caliber bullets, directly at your face.

Cyborg Ninja[edit]

Cyborg ninjas are usually people who don an exoskeleton and obtain bad ass ninja skills after: Taking an ass load of grenades and surviving, realizing that you child was born in some organization you don't care at all about,and finally the last way to become a cyborg ninja is to get laid and traveling the world continuing getting laid until until you get some sort of cancer or something..I didn't pay much attention to the last part.Cyborg ninjas generally are arch enemies of people who have hair reaching down to their spine, pirates, and Metal gears.

Ninja Warrior[edit]

A Ninja Warrior has proven their worth in a contest of strength, speed, and endurance. They are renowned not only for their godly physical and mental strength and stamina, but also for the sheer number of people who pose as one. It is believed that the number of people who pose as Ninja Warriors exceeds the number of people who pose as all other kinds of ninja combined by as much as 9001%.

Cheezy Ninja[edit]

A ninja which will not hesitate to cram your throat full of cheese, choking you to death. They are very rare and dont do much because their super rich from selling cheese. They use a cheese called Bega...

Inconvenience Ninja[edit]

The most pointless sub-class of ninjas who have succeeded into blending into the everyday world and who use their powers of stealth and martial arts to inconvenience anyone and everyone who crosses their path, these inconveniences include but are not limited to:

- filling your shampoo bottles with super glue.

- tying your shoe laces together while you're walking!

- filling your shampoo bottles with super glue

- gluing shavings back on to your pencils

- putting holes in your condoms while you're wearing them

- filling your super glue with shampoo bottles

- tripping your grandma

- stealing your food stamps

- stealing your random glowing magic-powered orbs

- drawing stuff on your face whilst you sleep

-having sex with every virgin seconds before you do.

-filling your normal glue bottles with super glue.

-writing annoying things on websites like this

- filling your glue bottles with super shampoo

Badass Ninja[edit]

Even though all ninjas are badass, this is included for those special ninjas, and we are not talking about you Naruto! or anyone associated with you!

Dumbass Ninja[edit]

You in a ninja suit seconds before a "REAL NINJA" rapes your ass and kills you with the 25 cent plastic sword you bought.

Ask-A-Ninja Ninja[edit]

There is only one known Ask-A-Ninja Ninja. The Ask-A-Ninja Ninja is the one and only Ninja (that you are aware of), that answers all your Questions. He even explains why Thr3e is the magic number.

Assless-Pants Ninja[edit]

This variety of ninja is commonly seen attacking Kung-Fu Jimmy Chow. They aren't the brightest of the various ninja types, as they believe they have a chance against Jimmy's Happy Awesome Power. However, they are more than qualified to kill a normal man. If you see one, treat them as a normal person. You will only be able to find them when they are stalking Jimmy Chow. Assless-Pants Ninjas can be stealthy (as in Kung-Fu Jimmy Chow episode 1, they hide in 31 different flavors of ice cream), but they often pose as simple people by holding newspapers, games, etc. These disguises almost always work against Jimmy, but they always get their bare asses kicked anyway. File:Http://i.ytimg.com/vi/YcviSkbd3uM/0.jpg

The Grim Ninja[edit]

The Grim Ninja is a ninja that was made when death came after the very first ninja and attempted to take his (of course its a him because back then women were forced to stay in the kitchen) soul. Death Failed however and during the clash the grim ninja came out. This ninja is so grim that people mistake him as a emo/goth but this is untrue. he now lives in dark alleyways and creates that bump in the night, and scares little kids(only the ones that beleive in him). he goes by many names including various other types of ninja this is why he is an unknown and rarley seen only one has reportedly seen him and known who he is... Cysyeh the grim, a relation to the grim ninja but without the ninja.

Misc.[edit]


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