Noddy Holder is the name given to any number of devices for which their main use is the holding of noddies. Enid Blyton was the first documented user of the noddy holder, using several of them to store her many noddy figurines which she had especially produced by Royal Dalton to commemorate the publishing of her first book in the famous, yet strangely macabre, children's series.
Design and technological advancement
The typical noddy holder consists of a metal plate or L-shaped bracket which allows for easy installation on any number of surfaces, although walls are the most favoured, with Georgian-era oak beams coming second in the rankings. Besides this standard mounting device, noddy holders can vary greatly from one to the next. Some, for instance, comprise simply of a loop of string selotaped to the bracket, whilst other, more elaborate holders are more elaborate, with a wide number of electronic variations of the classic theme entering the market in early 2005, many making use of nano-technology, thus making them more elaborate.
Many noddy holder enthusiasts were aghast at this new technology, resulting in widespread riots and demonstrations. One particularly tragic and extremely gruesome outbreak of violence occured at the 1997 International Noddy Holder Convention, where, amongst the many displays and stands of the more retro design, one particular entrepreneur had on display his newest range of internet-ready holders. He was set upon by the angry mob and later died of his injuries in an abandoned quarry. This made world-wide headlines around the globe and sparked the first of many large-scale wars between the progressive noddy holdists, who advocated the advancement of noddy holder technology, and the classical noddy holdists, who were largely senile and never made their intentions fully clear. This war, the first of many over the coming centuries, still rages on in many parts of the world, despite being largely unknown to most.
Famous users of the noddy holder
- Enid Blyton
- Sir Menzies Campbell
- Des Lynam
- Ozzy Osbourne
- Paul Ince
- Solid Snake
- Les Paul
- Margaret Thatcher
Non famous users of the noddy holder
- Mrs Youthostel from next-door-but-one
- John Johnjohnston, headmaster of the J. Johnjohnston School of Amateur Dramatics
- Henry Townsend, the protagonist of the video game Silent Hill 4
- Seebohm Rowntree Jr
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