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- 599 BC - The Inca Empire decides to convert themselves into Christianity, because the emperor thinks hes Jesus, but it is currently known as he got bribed by Spain.
- 600 BC - Inca Warriors land in Spain, and end up converting Spain to a Christian country
- 1776 - American Revolutionary War: Hessian mercenaries capture Fort Washington from the Patriots. Startled revolutionaries say, "what the fuck is a Hessian"?
- 1846 - The letters "æ, ø, å" are invented by Oscar Wilde, He states that he needed a little time off and that he was really bored in the 18'th century.
- 1904 - John Ambrose Fleming invents the Vacuum Tube. The vacuum tube makes possible electronics and early computers, and it is therefore considered a major advance over the Tube Full of Air.
- 1915 - Albert Einstein solves the problem of Uncyclopedia's many inconsistencies and contradictions, which scientists had been trying to solve for centuries. His theory states that in fact space-time is inconsistent, and Uncyclopedia simply follows a geodesic line through it.
- 1920 - Qantas, the national airline of Australia is registered as an air carrier. The first Qantas airliners are Douglas DC-3s equipped with a pouch on the underside to carry passengers.
- 1960 - Clark Gable passes away. Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn.
- 2001 Elmo (pictured) goes on a killing spree, attacking and consuming 4923 children attending a Sesame Street convention.
- 2002 - The First Kandahar International Film Festival is held. All filmmakers in attendance are hanged afterwards as Heathens.
- 2005 - The 100th anniversary celebration of the Feast of Saint Bukkake was cancelled after the star of the feast declared "I'm full"!
- 2006 - Paris Hilton... Bukkake... Ah... this is just too easy, in my eyes
- 2010 - People are still laughing by the idea that the world would come to an end in 2012, the movie 2012 gets a prize of it's comedy.