|Fire Danger: CATASTROPHIC (delete)
A nonsense word, thought to have originated with evil TV host Oprah Winfrey. This is considered to be one of the most bizarre and yet effective of all hellish statements, managing to irritate, confuse and cause cancer in most people all at once. Scientists are not yet certain of the true meaning of the statement, as all those that have tried have begun to exhibit severe irritation, followed by confusion and the sudden onset of massive cancerous lesions throughout the body.
A rough translation is as follows:
"Oh My God, What The Fuck, Rolling On The Floor, Laughing My Ass Off, ZeDong." The last word inexplicably refers to Mao Zedong, a dead Chinese Communist leader.
Note that Fuck and Ass are usually substituted for stronger words, but the current typist, while not really having a problem with others using them, has generally the opposite reaction to using them himself that others do, which is that others tend to let them slip when they don't intend to, while the current typist can't really bring himself to use them, and figures that besides they aren't exactly original, and that his variation will be found far less frequently, so he might as well get it out.
Furthermore, the previous typist has concluded that the use of God in this context is not, in fact, in vain. The current editor disagrees. The current editor agrees to disagree with the previous former current editor, provided that we all agree that the originator of this article was on crunch and didn't even have the decency to give us a "reacharound."
PLEASE NOTE: The new editor would like it to be known that all of the previous editors of this article have been sacked.