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“Special guest star/singer Alicia Keys

Welcome to The House of Pomegranates, the collection of short stories that is intended neither for the British child nor the British public.


Oprah Winfrey has inspired us to work on 46,157 stories and plays since opening in January 2005.

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Why was I born with such contemporaries?

Nice to meet you Sophia, my name is Randy

November 20: Sophia Day

  • 500 BC - Greeks invent philosophy(filos=love, Sophia)
  • 479 BC - Sophia invents boobs , millions stare.
  • 284 - Dodecahedron becomes Roman Emperor.
  • 403 - The Hagia Sophia completed in Constantinople. Her majestic domes are just huge.
  • 1453 - Turks capture Constantinople and rename it Is Stan Bull, adding minarets as phallic symbols around the Hagia Sophia.
  • 1910 - Mexican Revolution begins. Mexicans get some Madero and Porfirio Díaz is not amused at all.
  • 1910 - (about 1 o'clock PM): Siesta in Mexico. Revolution postponed.
  • 1917 - World War I: Battle of Cambrai begins - The Allies make surprise attack on the German Trenches while the Soldiers are transfixed on Sophia's Invention.
  • 1950 - Sofia Loren enters puberty. The Acme Hand Lotion Company sees its stock quadruple almost overnight.
  • 1958 - Sofia films 'Boy On A Dolphin'. Years later, Michael Jackson will purchase rights for the remake.
  • 1988 - Pac-Man and Ms. Pac-Man wed
  • 2028 - After 40 years of marriage, Pac-Man tragically dies whilst at work, Ms Pac-Man disbands the Pac-Man series of games. Forum riots ensue.

The history of the United States of America (Red White, and Blue!

The one duty we owe to history is to rewrite it.


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File:LLL


Today in Chicago


It is a very sad thing that nowadays there is so little useless information, so did you know...

From Uncyclopedia's Alicia Keys:

  • ...that the Byzantine Empire is pretty much the same as the Roman Empire, only not as cool?


Read on

This Month's Wit

Writer of the month.png
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.


Noobaward.png
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!


BePrepared.png
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!

HEIL FROSTY!



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