From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Jump to: navigation, search
Ovaltine, in its natural and rugged environment of Southern Antarctica.
Whoops! Maybe you were looking for Marmite?

Ovaltine (full name: Rich Chocolaty Ovaltine) is a brown, powdery malt substance that, when mixed with milk, creates a rich, chocolatey hot or cold drink that most children would kill for.

Ovaltine contains several vitamins and minerals (such as calcium, when mixed with milk) that are essential for daily growth and health. In fact, it has been scientifically proven that the magical properties of Ovaltine can extend one's life by up to 25%, given that the general population of Ovaltine drinkers are between the ages of 5-12 years old. Ovaltine can also be mixed with water but that's just nasty.

Common folklore and occasional rumours state that Ovaltine is made of eggs, hence the word ova in the brand name. Most people would like to disbelieve this, since drinking eggs isn't usually appetising and is indeed frowned upon in some cultures of Eastern Colorado. Other cultures believe Ovaltine is a distant relative of the common house cat(Felis Hominis), that has evolved over thousands of years and adapted to its harsh environment.

Cats, the primeval ancestors of Ovaltine?


Ovaltine can be found in various parts of the world including the U.S.A., the U.K., Switzerland, Antarctica (where the tame Ovaltines of modern day originated) and Myspace.

See Also[edit]