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Polytechnic University of Puerto Rico
Where do you want to go today?
Motto We have plasmas.
Established 1420
School type Private
Head Sr. M Jackson Ph.D Ph.D Ph.D Ph.D
Location TH, San Juan, Next to the poor people begging for money, Puerto Rico
Campus Urban, 358 acres (144 km/h)
Endowment $629.8 billion
Faculty 69
Mascot "The Crazy Fat Kid On a buffer overflow, screaming: "ay Dios mio, quiero corned beef""
Did you know…
that if you are reading this article, you know how to read?

“Where is the TBA class room??? ”

~ Prepa Student on PUPR

“What?!,Oooo I hate smurfs! Ill get you, Ill get all of you if its the last thing I ever do! He he he he haaa! ”

~ Gariel on PUPR

“Yo vi quieres fueron!!!, fueron unos enanos!!!! Ya me encabronaron!!!! ”

~ El Cabron ese.... on PUPR

“I have never smoked weed on the campus. ”

~ Guy with dreadlocks on PUPR

“Hack the planet! ”

~ Weird little dude on PUPR

“Como se llama ese cabron que me ha dado clase por 3 años!? ”

~ Student on PUPR Professor

<poll> Grade at physics class. A (at the first time) B (bah man that class suck!) C (wow how that score got there) D (I dint heard the hole story of black holes) F (damn it! not again!) </poll>


The Campus President, Sir M. Jackson Ph.D(notice his not black)

University Possible In Puerto Rico (U.P.I.P.R.) is a primitive, for-some-millions institution founded in 1966(devil's year), offering only technical courses in Land Surveying and calligraphy until 1974, when PUPR became a degree granting institution offering "baccalaureate" (wtf??) degrees (B.S.L.S.) and (B.S.C.E.) (kinds of B.S. -see Bullshit)

As time passed more academic offerings were made, including "Science of Reggaeton Dance", "Science of Kitty Murder", "Engineering malpractice and you", including many others.

In 2003 it offered a Masters degree in Computer Engineering with concentration in Desk Fucking and in 2005 Computer Science About Searching and downloading Porn over the Internet.

And now recently offering a Master degree in Differential Homogeneous Equations and Physics 2, in order to achieve this you have to take the class for the 94th time in a row.

One course was banned in the 1687 meeting of the polytechnic Illuminati, that being Web Page Development. This may explain why this page sucks so much.

It is the only university in the world that has a Flood Simulator.


excelent parking facilities!
dude, where's my car??

The PUPR is located in a floodable area where supports abundant fish and crustaceans that are also important for recreation and tourism. Also its a habitat for many speces of the threatened wildlife.

The University tower was cordoned off due to several and recurrent suicide attempts. Students were found to climb to the bell arrangment, scream curse words into the courtyard and leap to their deaths 7 stories bellow. Since its closing, these events have been reduced by more than 80%, though access is not completely limited. One inconclusive investigation reported sightings of ghosts in the tower who allegedly "...wanted you to jump."

It is also a known fact that the PUPR has the biggest campus in the universe, equivalent to all the disney parks around the world combined.

Most students are not able to find parking after 4am. Theories abound as to why this happens.. most agree that 99% of parking space is wasted because bad drivers and incompetent security personnel that let people from nearby "Hospital for the Retarded" (Departamento de Familia)park in university spots.

Mysteries at PUPR[edit]

“I see dead people ”

~ Student on PUPR Basement
Student possessed by the ghosts.
Advanced computer in the nanotech department. Its price tag says $10,000

The building that houses the PUPR used to be Psychriatric Hospital(i'm not kidding!) and now is haunted by a couple of friendly ghosts. The Ghost Busters visit the institution on a weekly basis but students still experience intermitent demonic possessions. It has been rumored that the ghosts can be scared away by playing the hit song "Rastrilleo"(I mean, who dead or alive wouldn't??).

Another mystery is the continually rising costs of the university. Every year there is a 23964% increase in registration fees. Registration forms and pay slips explain these fees as "parking access"(lol), "CTI technology fee" (what?) and "student activities". Most students agree LOLWTFBBQ.


"Bueno Bueno tenemos HP touch screen para el proximo trimestre a ver que piensan ah ah"
"Bueno, Bueno making the line to renew his visa, as a good, good permanent alien."
Physics Profersor
Electric Circuits Professor.."La Burbu"
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Power Point, Kiko (PhD candidate since 2001) in action!
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Ethical Hacking
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Micro 1 & 2 aka Mexicanus B. Llacus

The PUPR has the most talented faculty in Hato Rey well...um...second most (see Instituto de Banca). They love to give the most exiting and adventurous Power Point presentations. Some of them were prisoners during the Vietnam war (see Charón) and others seek revenge from Tito Puente, while others like to dance in the rain..naked. They are lean, mean ,fat-reducing machines and they like to wear glasses and hats to class.

We also have the most excellent faculty member called"Dr. Dr. Bueno Bueno Ph.D IN LMAOWTFBBQLOL". This so called "special" individual is a blessing to the University giving us the most instructed member of the comunity. His great wisdom is visible in his yellow (yellow, because they had like 50 years old) papers. If one or more of his yellow papers are missed, he automatically ends the class, because he has by magic an appointment with someone of the faculty.

Owner of a Ph. Bch. Byob, and a WTF in Colombian Clown College, he knows both how to use the Itunes program for the pc and how to bring coca to the continent. He give new meaning to the expression "Crazy Cracker".

Felix Nevarez, PhD (Candidate since 2001) aka Power Point or Kiko is a very smart professor, who's wisdom is visible like Bueno, Bueno, but in his case is visible in the right index finger. That finger has more muscles than even the Governator of California in his entire body in his primes. He's more than an expert clicking the computer using Power Point, not even Sonic the Hedgehog is faster than him. More than 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 clicks per minute. Probably he can beat the speed of light in a contest.
Faculty team

  • Remi the clown (ATUL)
  • Michael knight (Physics)
  • Donald Duck (Spanish)
  • Power Point (Advanced Programming)
  • Richard Simmons (Circuit I)
  • Gene Simmons (Socio Humanistic Studies)
  • Pamela Anderson Lee Ph.D (Organic Chemistry)
  • Mr. Bodyguard, Stone Cold or Nappa (Ethical Hacking)
  • Steve Jobs (Management)
  • Cowboy Roy (English)
  • Al Gore (Internet Programming)
  • Hugo Chavez (Ethics)
  • Regis Philbin (Finance)
  • Sponge Bob (Electronics)
  • Mr Potato (Database)
  • El Chaparro (microprocessors)
  • Peru's National Soccer Team (Mechanical Engineering Faculty)
  • Turey El Taino (Heat Transfer, Aerospace, Aerodynamics, Thermal Systems Laboratory)
  • Tio Toto (COE Director)

Famous Professor Quotes[edit]

Differential Homogeneous Equations and Physics 2 Professor Charón.

“In this next slide you can see... ”

~ Profesor on giving a class at PUPR

“Bueno..Bueno.. ”

~ Profesor on Class

“Estas son estraubeRRys, y estos son kiwis, óyeme bueno bueno, cómo se dice kiwi en español? ”

~ Bueno, Bueno on Database Class

“Los otros dias.... ”

~ Profesor on lying at PUPR

“All architects are women. ”

~ Dean of Architecture on PUPR Architects

“Dude, where's my car??? ”

~ profesor on PUPR parking

“There is no paper, internet or spoons ”

~ worker on CTE

“If my 12th wife is falling at speed v(t)... ”

~ Charon on PUPR Physics

“Sencilloooo, KVL, KCL, Ley DE OHMMMMmmm, muy bienn muy biennn ”

~ Daddy Smurf giving the electronics Class on PUPR

“Metodo nodal es infalible, la malla, falla. ”

~ Daddy Smurf giving the electronics Class on PUPR

“Ujum, ujum, ustedes tienen que usar "passive san convenchon". ”

~ Daddy Smurf giving the electronics Class on PUPR

“ajaa, ajaaa proximamente haremos un concierto de reggaeton con las campanas como parte de un proyecto de capstone y tambien un concurso de la mas perra! ”

~ Roman Lopez giving the Microproccesors Class on PUPR

“Sí aja, cuando yo fui hacer mi doctorado en inglaterra, si aja. Yo era un gringo hablando inglés si aja. Y allá yo no entendía nada, esos ingleses hablan mal el inglés orale. Pero a la semana ya los entedía si aja. Pero siempre que se despendían decían "silla", y yo no entendia porque no decia "gud bai", si aja. Mira que brutos y que una silla es decir adios, que morones, si aja. ”

~ Roman Lopez giving the Microproccesors Class on PUPR

“Hijole, ahorita mismo les voy a dar un espetial asignation guey! ”

~ Roman Lopez giving the Microproccesors Class on PUPR

“Como sus pays tienen chavos, pues ustedes estan ahi perdiendo el tiempo y no les importa na'. Pues yo como ya estudié me quedo aquí tomandome esta rica Sprite, ganandome los chavos fácil. ”

~ Tio Toto with the Capstone Group on PUPR

“Ah si, estas serguro? Darías la VIDA??? ”

~ Turey el Taino giving Intermidiate Fluids (Gases)

Inglés Sin tu Abuela (New English Course)[edit]

This course in given at the same time with your Microprocessor's class and Micro Interfacing's class at no cost by the great PhD^23 Román E. López.

  • output = oput
  • chip = ship
  • asignación = asignation
  • botón = bottom
  • reach = recah
  • dos = tow
  • USB = yuesbi
  • bluetooth = blutuf
  • bootstrap = bus-estraf
  • especial = espetial
  • d-bug = d-book
  • nintendo = nientindo
  • walmart = gualmar
  • mode = moud
  • strobe = estró
  • data bus = data vús
  • write = ruai
  • read = ruid
  • iniciar = estal
  • enable = enamble
  • upload = apload
  • download = danload
  • CompUSA = compúsa
  • debounce = dibons
  • illegal = iligal
  • stepper = estepel
  • corregir = corrojir
  • print function = prin funchon
  • earth flat = plano de tierra
  • alphanumeric = afanumeric
  • gate = gatillo
  • three = trece


Trix bunny says: "Silly faggot dicks are for chicks!!"

Most students fall in the following categories

  • Cacos
  • Emos
  • Fags (architects)
  • Airheads
  • Blacks
  • Corn Smokers
  • Communists
  • N00bs
  • Trolls
  • Bed wetters
  • Nazis
  • Crack Dealers

Student Activities[edit]

Mario peach.gif

IEEE - LOL WTF? Do they know it stands for Improvised Explosive Electronic Engineer!?!?

“It does? ”

~ noobish student on IEEE

hacking - noob hackers.

“Oops! ”

~ Student on Hacking the PUPR

“I'll get the screwdriver. You get the magnets!... maybe the floor will work!! ”

~ Student on Hacking the PUPR

“Smoke weed everyday! ”

~ stoner student on Activities

Famous graduated students[edit]

You in the future.
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Kobbo, one of the most famous students from PUPR
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Kobbo again
  • Tito "El Bambino"
  • Tito Puente (RIP)
  • Chuck Norris
  • Rolandito (hmm..so that's why we they can't find him, he's a Hacker)
  • Lindsay Lohan (maybe if I say it, it will actually happen)
  • Kobbo aka La Comay
  • YOUR MAMA!!!
  • Victor Fajardo
  • Eric Estrada (Fish & Chips actor)
  • Aunt Jemima
  • Uncle Ben
  • Tito Kayak
  • El negrito Bombon<-----Bembon????
  • George W. Bush (Summa Cum Laude)^-1 Class of 66
  • Hugo Chavez (Summa Cum Laude)^-1 Class of 66

Songs Inspired On PUPR[edit]

“Turn on the lights ”

~ Nelly Furtado (having sex at the parking) on PUPR

“Who let the dogs out? ”

~ Unknown artist lost on ELECTRICAL building on PUPR

“Se vale to...to en este sandwich de salchicha ”

~ Calle 13 on PUPR

“Huele a peligro ”

~ Unknown artist on eating at PUPR cafe

Advanced Proyects at the PUPR (Capstone Class)[edit]

This page

Laboratory Facilities[edit]


If smoking is a sport then we have the best facilities for it. And yeah we rule!!!!1!!11

Student Artwork[edit]

11-21-07 1427.jpg