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“Finished with my woman 'cause she couldn't help me with my mind, people think I'm insane because I am frowning all the time. All day long I think of things but nothing seems to satisfy, think I'll lose my mind if I don't find something to pacify. Can you help me? Occupy my brain? I need someone to show me the things in life I can't find, I can't see the things that make true happiness I must be blind. Make a joke and I will sigh and you will laugh and I will cry, happiness I cannot feel and love to me is so unreal. Now that you hear these words telling you of my state, I tell you to enjoy life I wish I could but it's too late.”

~ Black Sabbath on Depression
For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Paranoia.

Who sent you? What do you want here?

Nobody searches for this word with good intentions. This page doesn't like you. For your own good, click here and go away immediately.


Are you still here? You really want to know? Well, WE know now that you are a stubborn fuck? Go away <insert name here> - we know where you live.

Ok, so you get ONE chance. And don't screw up! We have your IP recorded. You won't see this page twice, no matter how you try.

You gotta do this in five steps.

1. If you are using a wireless network connection- press here.

2) Turn off your web cam and close down MSN. Turn all other browsers down. No way Jose, while here you are NOT going to stay connected to any other web source than this page.

3) Identify yourself by writing your true name with a soft ink pen on the screen in the square below:

/ /
/ <insert name here> /
/ /

No funny tricks! Just do AS I SAY!

4) When you are done with this, go to your kitchen window and check that it is no black car parked outside your flat. We don't trust you with a bug check, so just keep your mouth SHUT. NO FUCKING ROTFLMAO

5) On slightest doubt piss off! If coast is clear, turn off the lights and press here.

Remember kids, just because you're paranoid, doesn't mean they're not out to get you!

I didn't write this.