Paranoia/The Real Truth about Paranoia

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““Just because you are paranoid you cannot be sure that you are not being followed.” ”

~ Oscar Wilde on Paranoia

I don't have to tell you, you know it already.

There is no such thing as paranoia.

It is all a concept made up by the psychiatrists to silence those few who are brave enough to tell the truth about the conspiracy to take over the Earth made by the lizard/pig men from the center of the earth/space, currently controlling the government,

edit: This is the government. There is no such thing as a lizard/pig man. Continue doing your surface dwelling/earth-ape business, fattening yourself while we prepare to cook your delicious disgusting earth flesh.


... And this entire website is in fact a joke, and will soon be siezed by the FBI for evidence in a Child Pornography ring.

You have been warned.


Tin Foil Hats[edit]

Look, it's the government, maan. They've got these black helicopters that like, circle round with their special brainwave-reading widgets... You're not even safe thinking inside your own head! They know man! Everything you ever think about, they know. The only way you can like protect yourself is like to put yourself inside a Farrady cage, but they're big and get in the way, so use a tin foil hat instead man! Go on! Do it now, before they land the black helicopters & break your door down! Man, do it now! I've made mine with wires I can hook up to a battery so it confuses the brainwave-reading widgets. It works! They've not found me yet, and if they ever come for me I can take them all down man! I'll do it!! I'll... hang on, someone's at the door... ARRgh HELP me THey've foudn me! THey're breadking doswn the door!! They're loi;

There is nothing to see here. Please carry on with your normal everyday activities.


“"Just because you're paranoid, don't mean they're not after you."”

~ Kurt Cobain on being paranoid.

Are those snakes? Oh god, I hate snakes! Don't let them near me!

That is not a bowl of spaghetti, I've seen what a bowl of spaghetti looks like alright! Those are snakes god damn it! SWEET JESUS, I'M COVERED IN SNAKES!!!! GET THEM OFF OF ME!!! OH GOD, OH CHRIST PLEASE HELP ME! NO MORE SNAKES, NO MORE!!!! Why did you tell the government about me and this page why why ???

You must not be alarmed. There is no cause to worry. Just go to this page and relax for a while.