Personal Display of Affection

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“The city streets wont be clean until all of the PDA-ers are brought to justice”

~ Batman on PDA-ers

“"We can't help it if we're in love, love ”

~ Teenagers on Themselves

“"We PDA all the time, there's nine of us so there's always an odd man out, half our music is about PDA... the rest just sucks”

~ Slipknot on their Music and Lifestyles

Public Display of Affection also known as PDA-ing or PDA-ers all started in the Prehistoric ages with the Cavemen. After knocking their women unconscious they would go to the most populated area possible and would hug, kiss, or show affection in anyway. It was once told that Jesus himself tried to stop this plague of PDAing but was stopped due to Emma Kisinpubliks high concentrated PDA skills. Emma however was killed in the year 1830 by Chuck Norris upon birth. However many believe that her spirit stills roams the earth causing PDA everywheres, schools, malls, movie theaters, side walks, duck ponds...... everywheres.

Ways to Stop PDA[edit]

There are three major ways to stop these PDAers and it is crucial that you act upon will to make sure that they are stopped and since most PDAers are stupid these solutions are easy to accomplish.

  1. Upon sight of these people you must start Woohooing, start making them uncomfortable let them feel as you feel when they are around you. If they start to tell you to "F_ck off" then there is two easy words to make them stop, "No u" is all that has to be said.
  2. The Second way is by force, not by physically hitting them but by separating them for a long period of time so they forget about there PDA ways. This one is especially tricky considering you might become one the infected and might infect others.
  3. This third one is very easy, all you need is Chuck Norris' personal hotline and since the Chuck is always ready for a PDA emergency all you have to press is the Chuck pound key on your phone.

There are more minor ways to stop PDA. These won't fully stop the PDAers but they will get pissed off enough to stop them. (Be aware that some PDAers are athletic and will chase you so always have a way to escape their PDA ways.) Some ways to stop them are loud music in which they hate like rock, rap , metal (except Slipknot), country, pop, techno, R&B, and Metallica. The reason they hate Metallica is because they think they are worn out and aren't Slipknot which most PDAers love. Those of you who are going to jail the PDAers in there can be bought with your muffin considering it's not normal food and PDAers can live off the cheapest kinds of food. For the old PDAers most of them have war stories that they love to tell so if you can sit through 3 hours of Grandpa's boring War stories then you are many of the few and the brave who can.

Most Common PDAers[edit]

The most common PDAers are inmates, teens, and old people preferably between the ages of 56-70. These people tend to be "in love" but they just wanna piss people off. Old People say they are in love for ever but we all know that they are just using it as a excuse to PDA all over our city streets and pollute our air. The reason no one wants to go to prison isn't cause of AIDs or being raped its cause of the PDA that happens on the inside. A list of some other PDA groups are:

  • Baseball Players
  • Football Players
  • Goths
  • Stoners
  • Hobbitts
  • Unicorns
  • Barney
  • The KKK
  • The League of Super PDAers
  • Desperate beer goggle drunks at 3AM

This list is always growing by the second so be aware of who your sitting next to the next time your at a BeeGees concert cause you might be one of the many affected with this disease of which there is no cure to yet, but the Canadians have slowed the transformation of the PDA they havent stopped it totally yet.