Positron

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“Particle Physics is like sex. I do it best when I am alone in my room”

~ Paul Hewitt on Particle Physics


A Positron is a frozen snack served in the region of the Sahara Desert and is intended to cause cross-saharan explorers to laugh at the speed of its melting before dying of dehydration and/or stabbing in the back by their murderous companion, who, for obvious reasons, is deperate for water and believes that their companion still has some. Most of the time, they're wrong, and instead suck the moisture off the bottom of the bowl of their Positron.

One of the serving styles of the positron, this one is notorious for emmiting gamma rays and leptons.

Positrons have a varying appearance, but they all have the same positive effect on people, or as it is known in the culinary world a "positive charge". Positrons are packed dry into heatproof plastic containers and, to "inflate" them to their correct size, they must be combined with around one litre of water. Although many people frown on how much life-preserving water must be used, other have noted that it brings a quicker end to the suffering, and if you really don't want to use water, tetrachloromethane works just as well, both dissolving any sand on the Positron, and poisoning you as soon as it melts.

Little known Fact[edit]

The Positron is actually one particle, and becomes so during the cooking process in industrial ovens at π°C. This causes the Positron mix to convert to energy and back, forming into a remarkable contradiction to both physics and the presidency campaign of Hillary Clinton, how this occurs is a mystery. Furthermore, it is unknown how it appears in different colours and has different properties in this state leading most experts to believe that its those damn Nazis that are behind it all. Jaffa Cakes take time to bake

Elementary Particles
Proton - Muon - Bozo - Graviton - Gluon - Quark - Electron - Photon - Moron - Neutrino - Gayon - Darkon - Unobtainium - Unununium - Ballmiton - Crouton - Tachyon - Tron - Badger - Sauron - Roricon - Spork - Hardon - Onion - Galvatron