“Don't go down into the housing projects! The little boy down the street went down there and he was kidnapped by gypsies and sold to the Japanese for PURPOSES UNKNOWN.”
“IT'S OVER 9000!!!”
This article was created FOR PURPOSES UNKNOWN. As a result I have no idea what the crap I'm taking about, so If you still want to read this, then you're a trooper.
The history of purposes unknown
The phrase was coined by author, witty smartass and Uncyclopedia's favourite meme Oscar Wilde, who was perhaps best known for his erotic novel Girls Gone Wilde. The phrase "purposes unknown" was created for purposes unknown, although some people have a theory that the phrase was coined so that corrupt politicians could cover up their own unknown purposes. Another theory is that the phrase provides a convenient alternative to actually telling the truth (i.e "Honest officer, that underage girl is in my car for purposes unknown"). Another rather sick, twisted fucked up, perverted, whacked-out opinion is that Wilde created the phrase so that he could cover up his evil, sick perverted affair with all-round whore Your Mom.
Purposes unknown today
Modern use of the phrase "purposes unknown" generally has something to do with anal rape, or assorted turd fetish sex tapes such as 2children1pedophile. The purpose for these so-called "sex tapes" is unknown, as no-one on earth could possibly find these videos arousing (excluding MJ and Gary Glitter. But then again, they aren't really down-to-earth guys are they? Hell, Michael dresses up like Peter Pan and dangles small children from 10th story windows!)
Examples of things that occurred, or were created for purposes unknown
- The disappearance of the little boy who lives down the street
- The Killers' song "For Reasons Unknown"
- The popularity of Chris Crocker
- George Dubya Bush
- Your mom's face
- Happy Hardcore
- Half of
Coldplay'sChris Martin's videos. Walking/just playing instruments for the entire video isn't really entertaining. Like the "Yellow" and "Fix You" videos. Although "The Scientist" and the "Talk" were interesting. Chris Martin's kid Apple was named that for Purposes unknown.
- Male Combee
- Whatever goes on in the house of the creepy guy who lives across the street
- The video tape from that movie The Ring
- The music of Soulja Boy
- Bat Fuck Insanity (not to be confused with Bat Fuckin' Sanity)
- The Kennedy Assassination
|Sexual Fetishes, Paraphilias, and Assorted Perversions|
-ICU: tag added by anon ip. removed as per UN:ICU