Pwnied

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iloveponies.com

Pwnied is a state of being wherein a coworker has just caused you shame and humiliation by sneaking over to your computer when you've left it idle and unlocked, and opened one or more web browsers pointed to sites most suitable for an eight-year-old girl.

If this happens to you, do not attempt to retaliate. There is simply no valid comeuppance to this awesome gambit. Just accept it: you have been pwnied.

Auto-Pony[edit]

Although the act of pwnieing is already the pinnacle of the office prank, and thus utterly impossible to improve on, there is one way to improve upon it.

All you need is a blank CD. Copy the following Autorun.inf and batch file onto it, and when your coworker gets up to go do whatever it is he does for half an hour in the bathroom, casually pop it into the tray.

autorun.inf code[edit]

[AutoRun]
open=pony.bat

pony.bat[edit]

@echo off
start /MAX iexplore.exe "http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_ss_gw?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=barbie"
start /MAX iexplore.exe "http://www.amazon.com/s/qid=1217019644/ref=sr_kk_3?ie=UTF8&search-alias=aps&field-keywords=bratz"
start /MAX iexplore.exe "http://iloveponies.com"
start /MAX iexplore.exe "http://metaatem.net/words/iloveponies"
start /MAX iexplore.exe "http://www.toysrus.com/shop/index.jsp?categoryId=2262938"
start /MAX iexplore.exe "http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Pwnied"

Future Work[edit]

Recently, research has been undertaken with the hopes of improving even further on the concept of pwnieing one's co-workers. An AppleScript version has been hacked together, although frankly, it's hard to see much demand for it.

However, future versions will include auto-rotating and random pages. This will make it more likely that one's co-workers will be suspected of actually visiting the sites, rather than having been the victim of the most supremely awesome prank theoretically possible.