Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii

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Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii
Rainbowsprinklesawsome.jpg
Scientific classification
Kingdom Gayness
Phylum Rainbow Sprinklcus
Class Mathematics
Order Alphabetical
Family None, They are genetically engineered
Genus Not really
Species Equs Sprinkle Con Rainbowicus
Binomial name
"Am I on Drugs"
Specifications
Primary armament coolness
Secondary armament coolness times two
Power supply mountain goat feasts
Health 500,000,000
Mana super large
Strength 0.087
Intelligence A rock that has listened to George W. Bush
Weight Fat
Length Long
Special attack wu tang punch
Conservation status
none


“Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii are great dictators and tasty snacks too!”

~ Hitler on Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii

“Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii, sounds like a gay greek myth.”

~ Oscar Wilde on Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii

“If I were a Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii, I would eat mountain goats too.”

~ Mountain Goat on Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii

“Are Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii greek mythology? If they are, then I should try that religion some day”

~ Jesus Christ on Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii

“Isn't it pegasuses?”

~ Anonymous on Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii

“I want a sundae with rainbow sprinkles on top.”

~ Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii on Fast Food Restaurants


DemonicPegasus.jpg

Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii are genetically engineered in factories that appear to be child labor sweat shops. They are unique Pegasus because they only eat girly sundaes with rainbow sprinkles on top, mountain goats, and grass hay unlike the usual diet of a Pegasus which includes unicorns and pixies. Also they migrate to the north pole where the socialize with flying reindeer (SANTA IS REAL OMFG!!!). On the outside they appear harmless and wimpy, but upsetting a Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasus could get your A** lasered by the lasers which they stole from the star trek crew. Baby and High School Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii have no rainbow sprinkles only red eyes. Middle and High School Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii have zits that eventually pop and become rainbow sprinkles.


How to make a Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii[edit]

DO NOT TRY UNLESS YOU ARE A DOCTOR IN RAINBOW SPRINKLE SCIENCES! First you must gather the rare materials needed in make a rainbow sprinkle pegasii. Some of these items can be found in hell, prostitute rings, your mother, and whole foods.

milk, eggs, celery, Brussels sprouts, Magic, Rainbow Sprinkle Genome, Pegasus Genome, nipple rings, kruchnevyian citizens, orange peels, cough syrup, diet coke and mentos, black fungus, eternal fire, and apple sauce.

Once you have gathered these items you have now earned 10 hunting and gathering points. You can also now begin to boil a pot of oil. Dip and fry all of the dry ingredients. While frying, preheat your oven to 350 degrees Celsius and wait for the dry ingredients to become crisp and firm. Then mix your eggs in a separate bowl. Combine all of the ingredients in a large mixing bowl. Then you can eat them or place them in a nuclear reactor and wait for eight days or until your Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasus is complete.

The Histories of the Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii[edit]

The Beginning[edit]

14 years ago a crazy scientist found the rainbow sprinkle genome and illegally added it to the Pegasus genome. The U.S.A. found out about the experiment and ordered the scientist to destroy it, but George W. Bush found extreme passion for the animal and only said that it had to leave the country. The experiment was then shipped to central america to be quarantined on an island. When scientists tried to create an amusement park out of the island the power was shut off during a storm and the rainbow sprinkle pegasus escaped. Meanwhile the scientist escaped and created another rainbow sprinkle pegasii. The two pegasii met and destroyed their creator, which they discovered was a mistake. The left the western hemisphere because they were being charged with murder crimes. They headed towards Europe.

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Once they reach paris they realized that they fit in perfectly because they were pussies, gay, and had long hair. They then tried to gain citizen ship but were denied because they could not reproduce. They then migrated to ireland. Unfortunately no one believed they were real so they hid in a small area of water in which they had there picture taken and were mistaken for the loch ness monster. Once again they moved. They tried moving to England, Italy, Spain, Germany, and Kosovo but they were denied citizenship. The pegasii were then sent to jail because they were traveling with out passports. The then were sent to the Philippines were they were in a thriller and soljier boy video. They did not get a good role so there is no evidence for them in the youtube video. After 20 days they were released and flew to Africa were they fit in very well.

The Dick-tatorship of the U.S.R.S.P.[edit]

A common U.S.R.S.P. officer

They then took over all of the sweat shops in southern African Countries to force the humans into slavery and made them create a female rainbow sprinkle Pegasus. They reproduced and became a large country. Eventually the U.S.R.S.P (United Slavery of the Rainbow Sprinkle Pegusi) had control of all Africa and industrial China. The U.S.R.S.P. became a dictatorship under their blood thirsty leader Sir Fuzzy McFuzzyIAmADictator McFuzzyBalls.

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The U.S.R.S.P. claimed they were not a dictatorship and George W. Bush believed them. They then took over all of asia and became known as the hardest working animals in the world and animals with the highest GPA in the world. They tried expanding but came across the mountain goats during a mountain goat race. This upset the fine balance between the mountain goats and rainbow sprinkle pegasii and so the both started eating each other. They then tried taking over europe but were only successful with the capture of France and Poland. Unfortunately this cause mass chaos and destruction in the religious status in western europe but everyone knows that rainbow sprinkle pegasii do believe in not believing in religion, so they didn't care. Unfortunately this religious tactic cost them and sent europe into a catastrophic destruction in which all of europe, except Finland, Sweden, Scandinavia, and the Netherlands were blown of the map. Because of this defeat the U.S.R.S.P. created a new tactic know as the R.S.P. or Rainbow Sprinkle Phalanx. This tactic upset the mountain goats. The U.S.R.S.P. later went to war against the mountain goats, who were in alliance with Krushnevya and so they went to war against the Krushnevyans. Unfortunately they were defeated and were only left with their southern African land and the Mountain goats began to produce led products in land they gained in industrial China.

The Decline of the U.S.R.S.P.[edit]

A Pseudo-mountain goat racer's uniform

The U.S.R.S.P. eventually died out in a similar way as Ancient Greece after the Peloponnesian war. All the females died out and the males became transexuals. They are rarely talked about today which is why very few humans have heard of them. They are now used for psuedo-mountain goat racing, in which the Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii dress up a goats and race. The relationship between psuedo-mountain goat racing and mountain goat racing is similar the relationship between rugby and football; sad and pathetic. Psuedo-mountain goat racing is considered a challenge, because Pegasii only have two udders so it is very hard to milk them while racing. Also only pregnant females can give milk, so very few Pegasii can participate. The best every Pseudo-Mountain goat racer is B. Hussein Obama aka Baraq Hussein Osama who defeated The Hillary Beast of the north because she was like the typical American, fat and lazy. McCain how ever did not believe in Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii so he decided to stick with the classic Mountain Goat racing. McCain said he should not switch because he has been watching mountain goat racing since the first race in April 4, 1812. They are also used as military spies for the CIA for arial images. They are rarely used due to their distinctive rainbow sprinkle underside. Some reports have reported that rainbow sprinkle pegasii have been used as sundae toppings in South America. Scientist believe they are endangered, but they do not care so the Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii were said to have gone extinct recently.

The U.S.R.S.P. Today[edit]

The U.S.R.S.P. has recently acquired WMD they plan to destroy the sun on December 11, 2019 at 21:38. The information about Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii is highly classified and they are able to send death beams to who ever has information on them. See the people who know about their existence below. These people are set to be destroyed by inviting them to a dinner party in the middle of no where and sending a large nuke to destroy them.

People Who Know About Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii[edit]

Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii Breeds[edit]

Sometimes the offspring of Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii have mutations. Most of the time, like in this case, they are eaten.

Following the common rules of evolution, there are different breeds of rainbow sprinkle pegasii. Each breed is categorized by the other breed of rainbow pegasii on which they feast upon. This is called Ro-Cham-Beau feasting, because one feeds on another who feeds on another who feeds upon the first mentioned. Therefore there can only be three breeds of rainbow pegasii in the world at one time.

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German Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii[edit]

The top breed aka "Rock" is known as the German Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii. They are the most common breed and considered the most intelligent. They were the only breed allowed on the U.S.R.S.P. senate. They have been known to feast upon the flesh of the African Rainbow Star Pegasii. Their top predators are the American Horned Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii and various forms of sauropods. The German Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii are known for their top psuedo-mountain goat racing skills in the olympics. They constantly score second and third place only beaten by the notorious fainting goats. There great athletic ability is caused by their ability to use magic. A picture of this breed, shown at the left, was taken out of the space shuttle. This picture demonstrated the fighting tactics of the German Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii.

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African Rainbow Star Pegasii[edit]

The second top breed is the African Rainbow Star Pegasii is also known as "Scissors," because it is a Emo breed. They have been known to have the ability to absorb their laser guns and shoot people with their eyes. This ability help the Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii in the war against terrorism. They are a rarer breed because they still have to be created in labs due to their inability to reproduce. They also have been killed off by AIDS and other STDs. Most breeds of Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii do not like the African Rainbow Star Pegasii because they do not have the usual sprinkle pattern. Also because they are rare there have been no photographs taken of them. Instead there is one artist conception of an African Rainbow Star Pegasii, but it is in black and white ink because the artist did not have a colored pencil sharpener. This drawing leads to the common misconception that African Rainbow Stars are orange. Very little is known about African Rainbow Stars because of their rareness. African rainbow stars are feasted upon by the German Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii. They eat American Horned Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii.

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American Horned Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii[edit]

The American Horned Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii is considered "paper." They are the least intelligent and the fattest of all the Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii. There has been speculation on the part of them being considered a form of pegasii because of the fact that they do not have wings but instead a horn. Unicorns have been known to have horns and so some experts believe them to be unicorns. Because of this, most Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii do not like this breed as it is considered to be traitorous as seen in the Pegasus-Unicorn War in which some American Horned Rainbow Sprinkles stabbed the pegasii in the back, with their horns. Other experts on the other hand, believe that they are Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii because they follow the Ro-Cham-Beau food chain theory. American Horned Rainbow Sprinkles devour German Rainbow Sprinkles and are eaten by African Rainbow Stars.

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Extinct Breeds[edit]

Some extinct breeds are known. For example the Polish Rainbow Stars of David Pegasii and the Chinese Rainbow Smog Pegasii (also could have been just a cloud of smog but the locals could not tell because there was so much pollution in the air). One breed that was in power for a long time but later replaced by the German Rainbow Sprinkle was the Mario Brothers Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii. Besides feasting upon the other Pegasii they also ate koopas, mushroom people, and large turtle-things. They also got paid salary by smashing blocks that were randomly placed in the street. One photograph was found on some guys cellphone which he took while playing his Wii.

Pegasii Legends and Stories[edit]

Although Pegasii do believe in not believing religion, humans have still written countless stories about them and their creation.

A Standard Creation Story:

“Once upon a time the horse and the great egret sat down to have ice cream. The horse told the egret that he thought it would be cool if there was a horse egret combo. They both agreed. Then the snake came along and the egret and the horse knew all that was good and all that was evil. Around 7 months after the horse and the egret were married they had a child. They named him pegasus. But pegasus was gay, so the devil marked him with rainbows to make everyone know he was gay. But because pegasus was spotted only his spots turned rainbow. The end.”

~ Religious Fiction on Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii


A Standard Fable Relating to Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii:

“Once upon a time there was a beautiful princess who lived in the top towers of a castle far, far, even further away, farther, really far away. The prince wanted to marry her, but he would only ride to her on a rainbow spotted horse. And so the king fetched his servants to find the prince a rainbow spotted horse. The found one and gave him to the prince. He rode and rescued the princess. While the princess and the prince were "rejoicing" over their future marriage the rainbow spotted horse revealed that he was actually a rainbow sprinkle pegasii. The prince and the princess never return, but the rainbow sprinkle pegasii had a two week supply of food. The moral is never rejoice before marriage.”

~ Fable on Rainbow Sprinkle Pegasii

See Also[edit]